Weigh in (71)

There is a teeny tiny chance that the wheels may be falling off at the moment. No way to sugarcoat it, now weighing in at 15 stone 11.2 pounds, which represents another three pounds on. Half a stone in a fortnight takes some doing doesn't it?! Even I was surprised this time. As usual, before getting on the scales I did the usual flashback of what I did (credit) and what I ate (debit), and although it was far from ideal I would not have arithmeticked a week-end debit of this magnitude.

So what has got the wheels so wibbly-wobbly? You know that unsettled feeling I talked about last week? Well, it still hasn't gone away; although a decision (see previous) has been made, action inevitably has to follow; some of which are going to be highly unpleasant, and others merely come under the category of 'significant upheaval'. All of the above is hardly commensurate with de-unsettling (isn't there a better word for that?!!) my current state of mind. Focus is proving very hard to gain, and even harder to maintain.

The gym trips have dried up once again too; haven't been at all this week. I just can't snift the shiffles at the moment, and am nervous about going back before I am fully fit. Some people say that exercise can shift a cold, but surely it depends on how bad the cold is; it could just as easily make it worse and I don't want two weeks away from the gym to become a month. The diet has been okay, but without working up a sweat three times a week what was a dietary misdemeanour has now become a capital offence (shooting the sheriff being downgraded to a slap on the wrist).

No fast food this week, nevertheless there was a fair bit of indulging at the weekend at our family bonfire night. Got a bit of exercise with all the preparations, but that was more than counteracted by the sandwiches, burgers and mulled wine which were finding their way - quite by accident you understand - into my gob. Then on the night of a much later weigh in than usual it was a trip out to see the new bond movie (excellent film; particularly on the giant IMAX screen, even I fancy Daniel Craig when his pecs are that size!), ended up at Papa G's again for a regular BBQ Chicken burger and fat chips, with a side order of.....fat chips (incidentally fat chips are not as bad as they sound; the 'fat' refers to their size. They are more like wedges, so more chip and less fat....I'm not convincing you am I?!!). As my usual pre-weigh-in routine is a trip to the gym and getting on the scales before I have dinner - opposed to going out, having a big dinner, and getting on the scales in the early hours of Wednesday morning - there is mitigation in this week's result which hopefully will revel, or even reveal itself when I get back into the usual routine.

I'm trying not to panic Mister Mainwaring (that should be a challenging pop culture reference for any non-UK residents), at either the alarming weight gain or the fact that two weeks out of the gym will put me several steps back in training for London next year (okay; typing that has got me a little bit panicky........panic growing...........we are now at def. con. 2; see I can even do U.S. cultural references!).

I know, noone ever said this was going to be easy; and like so many things that are worth doing there are challenges along the way. Strangely enough I need them, we need them; they test and strengthen our resolve to succeed, and not be defeated by the obstacles put in our way, by fear, by doubt (see post on 'The Adjustment Bureau', see; there are common themes running through my life!). So what am I going to do......?

1. Not panic
2. Eat careful
3. First badminton match for three weeks on Friday night (should be interesting!)
4. First gym trip for two weeks on Sunday morning (taking it gently)

The prospect of taking positive action is already a comfort, and makes me confident of getting the weight going in the right direction this time next week (regretfully not as quickly as it went upwards I fear.....little steps.....little steps....). I also believe that the cycle of 'feeling poorly = no exercise=putting on weight=feeling crap=feeling poorlier......' vicious circle can just as easily become 'light exercise=feeling better=losing weight=feeling better still=more exercise=more positivity=feeling betterer stiller' with a few tweaks and a bit of effort. Life's schedule appears to be getting back to some semblance of normality now so I feel I'm ready to get back to the gym and have a go without doing myself much of a mischief; the rest should follow.

Fingers crossed for better news next week.