2 days to go.........Wot no weigh in???

Sorry, no weigh in today.....I did think about packing my scales with me to my brothers, but then I realised that I am not a total obsessive....much. Anyway, surely for a reliable comparison of results you need the same scales on - pretty much - the same place on the same floor. Not prepared to risk and unnaturally high read-out this close to the marathon; I need positivity around me at the moment, and lots of it.

So for the first time in getting on for a century of weeks, I do not know what my weight is!! (and no, I'm not cheating because I have been eating like a pig and have put a stone on.....I don't think). It's a mystery to me (the game commences; for the usual fee, plus expenses..), but I will convince myself - and my knees - that I have lost a stone and a half, making the marathon seem like I am walking on the moon (giant steps are what I'll take, I hope myyyy legs don't break)..

I think I need a lie down..............I'm talking even more blarney than I usually do!

Calm again today; still at the one day at a time stage currently. Here's hoping I can keep it all under control until about 100 yards away from the finish line!!

Two days to go??????

OH

MY

GOD!!!!!

9 days to go........Weigh in (91)

Back o' the net!!!

I must have been a VERY good boy this week, as 15 stone 8 pounds has now become 15 stone 3.4 pounds. Yes, that is five, five, FIVE pounds off. Get in there.

Probably the perfect week to be honest; the big run, two little 'uns, and eating really well. Simple when you (I) put it that way eh? What's with all the fuss about losing weight then? It's such a doddle.......

Just goes to show how difficult it can be sometimes to carry out the blooming obvious. Everyone knows what they need to do to lose weight, and it is so annoying that the doing is do difficult. BUT, that is not this week; this week, weight is down and life is good. Five pounds less to lug round London is going to help no end.

With the tapering phase of the training well under way, I would imagine this will be the lightest I will be for a few weeks; no big runs to sweat off the pounds. At worst I would imagine I will be around 15 stone 5 come the oh so big day, and I can live with that; plus my thighs are ever-increasing to the size of twin tree trunks so they must be getting used to bearing the strain! My knees are also thanking me no end.

Single figures on the countdown now; another point when thing become that little bit more real. Trying not to 'go there' at the moment, as if I go there I may never get out again. There's a whole nine days to go yet; loadsa time.......

16 days to go.......Weigh in (90)

Hmmmmm, I think I can take this one on the chin; not quite a full pound on, but enough to push me to 15 stone 8 (one on....our survey said.....); darn it.

I may have had the big run last Sunday in the pro column, but bolstering the cons  was the big family Easter meal later one the same day. I'm not sure if it has become tradition elsewhere, but as at Christmas it's turkey and all the trimmings for the Blaydon clan; and one trimming in particular is my nemesis, the Moriarty to my Holmes, the Joker to my Batman, the Hyde to my seek....errrr.....Jekyll. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the bane of my life....bread sauce.

Give me a spoon and a bowl of this made from any recipe variation, and I can comfortably make a meal of it - even if the meal in question is breakfast (it looks a bit like porridge, does that count? - but the Paul Blaydon bread sauce concoction is my own personal nomination to the Nobel prize for cookery....or possibly pure evil I haven't decided yet. I am not sure what the attraction is, but I suspect that it's because bread sauce is gloopy, and has the flavour of........let me see.......

Now by some bizarre, fortunate quirk of fate, even though bread is bad for you, bread sauce is actually SO healthy. Not only that, it is widely agreed that said sauce forms the basis of a perfect marathon preparation.....you're not buying that are you? (you're shaking your head now aren't you?) this time it wasn't even worth the effort was it? (yep, still shaking your head). I'll admit; it is my weakness, and considering how much of it I ate, it's something of a miracle that I only put one pound on. The danger bells started to ring when I found myself  - quite by accident you understand - tucking into a bread sauce sandwich (yes, I know; bread between two slices of.....bread!....but it just tastes so NICE!!); and yes, there was a bowl (full at the beginning, empty at the end) and spoon involved at one point.

Then there was Paul's Victoria sponge. I don't know what he did with the cream, but it tasted so nice that give me another bowl and give me the chance to clean my spoon of bread sauce and I won't be held responsible for my actions!

You may wonder why I am not a little more panic-stricken about putting weight on. Don't get me wrong, I'm annoyed; but three pounds off last week followed by one on this is still a healthy net gain (meaning a loss.......you know what I mean), so I am staying upbeat. Not only this, I still feel good, and running seventeen and a half miles (sorry, took a wrong turn on the route and it shortened it a bit; still good though) is not something to be sniffed at. Finally, I need to stay relaxed. As marathon day can be safely described as 'imminent'; tension is going to get me stressed mentally and injured physically. I need a certain amount of trust that if I keep doing what I need to do in training, that the weight will take care of itself.

Just don't throw it back in my face if I knack it all up next Friday will you?!!!!

23 days to go.........Weigh in (89)

Well that is something of a HUGE relief may I say. If I hadn't lost weight this time then it would really have been a case of having no clue what I am doing wrong. I've been so near to a saint this week that even Mother Teresa would be pointing her bony finger at me and calling me a goody two-shoes.

So, my head, my heart, and my knees are delighted to divulge a weight loss of three pounds (slightly less, but roundy downy from 15 stone 7.4) to bring me in to 15 stone 7. It's felt really good this week, and more importantly it hasn't felt like too much of a struggle. Considering the disaster of last Sunday's failed attempt at 17 miles, it's good to have something positive to dwell on, and give me optimism for the next long run in a couple of days. To turn things around from falling 1.5 miles short one week to success the next, I needed to get fitter, and I needed to get lighter. Two mini-runs behind me this week have ticked the former, and the result today is great news and has diminished the nerves which have been jangling since the personal humiliation of having to hobble home, in between having to take a rest. (I've seen people in similar situations, and they always have my sympathy, but it is scant consolation; believe me, I know!)

This is now the template I need to adopt for the few weeks ahead; if I can do that then maybe 26 miles might not be quite so much of a marathon marathon!

The weekend is going to be quite a test. Family doings at Mums; where there will no doubt be a significant amount of indulgence flashing before my eyes in the form of chocolate, chocolate and, more chocolate. I don't want another weekend of putting weight on, but with the best efforts this week it might still prove too difficult. Part of me wants another weight loss, but the realistic part of me will quite happily settle for breaking even and setting myself up for a concerted push over the last couple of weeks.

Good grief, does that REALLY say 23 days??????

Weigh in (89)......(30 days)

Thirty days to go.....and I still haven't got it right. Good God I am SO bad at this. It's two pounds on and now back to my old favourite of 15 stone 10 pounds (9.6 actually;  that makes me feel sooooo much better, like hell). It's like an old friend......that I never really liked but seem to be stuck with, and they won't leave me alone.

It is plain and simple; the diet I am currently on is just not working. It is one which I think should work, but time after time I am proving myself wrong. I have to do more; I just have to do better, it's not good enough. Twenty six miles is an awful long way, but it is going to feel a whole lot easier if I can get some more stuffing weight off. It is not just one thing; it seems to be lots of niggly wiggly things......too much for breakfast... ...biscuits in the hotel room......too much bread back at home....who knows? I know if I can keep it tight and maintain the exercise levels then the results will go my way. Talking about it is really easy may I say; it's the actual doing it that appears to be the problem.

I refuse to get maudlin, but it is such an easy trap to fall into; the closest I have ever got to saying 'What do I have to do???!' Not going to say it though (pretend I just didn't). There is still time to put things right. Losing weight is going to have long term benefits way beyond the marathon, but it's safe to say that the race itself is proving a strong, short-term incentive.

Weirdly enough, despite the result, I still feel really good; strong, alert, in control (which considering my life at the moment is a mini-miracle in itself). Maybe there is some truth in the old muscle weighs more than fat theory, and if my legs are anything to go by that might be the reason for putting on weight (I'm a lean, mean, leggit machine). Anyhoo; whether truth there be or truth there be not, I need to get weight off. Even a couple of pounds might make all the difference to my chances of finishing the marathon (always preferred Double-Deckers myself; have I cracked that joke yet??) and still being able to walk.

You must be getting tired of the 'this week I REALLY have to make it happen' speech; and to be honest so am I. Come on Adrian; don't talk, just do. Four weeks, that's all I have to maintain focus for and then I can take a break from it all (not completely returning to old nasty habits, but possibly popping in to see them for a quick cup of lard.....errrrr.......tea); it really will all be worth it.

Won't it????

Weigh in (88)

Now THAT's what I'm talking about!! Back of the net!!!!!!

I know what you're thinking, someone who starts a post with eight exclamation marks has either spasmed on the shift-1 button (and their delete button doesn't work) or he has some good news.....and I can confidently say....there ain't nothing wrong with my delete button! (ooops, there goes number nine!....and ten.....)

Two pounds off this week, bringing me in at a cool and sleek 15 stone 8 pounds dead (it's quire refreshing not to have to round-up for a change). Surprising really, as I have only managed one training session (tonight, five miles.....FIVE MILES!! still haven't got used to talking like that sort of distance is like popping down to the corner shop) this week. Seems I have been a much better boy with what I have been eating though.

Don't get me wrong, I am extremely pleased by the result; but if the truth be known I am a little nervous about where I am going at the moment. I keep prattling on about regaining and maintaining control over what I am eating, and even though this weigh in has gone well, it owes itself a lot more to good luck than good judgement. It is only because the temptation has not been shoved in front of my eyes too much that I haven't been tempted (at least I don't openly go out hunting for it I suppose). The worry is that if next week's course of events goes even slightly different, then my eating could just as easily go to pot, and the weight goes back on again. That's pretty much the story of the last couple months isn't it? Really need to break the cycle.

Let's not get to whiney here; it's a good result, and a weight loss always fills me with fresh motivation to push on and make it two good weeks in a row (been a while since I've had a god fortnight). It's so much harder to feel positive after a bad weigh in so let's hope that won't be something I have to worry about for a few weeks. With the running distance on the up I could do with a little less impact on the limbs, and a running style which is a little more ice-skater and a little less Frankenstein! There is still time to make a difference to my fortunes come marathon-time, I need to make the most of every minute.

37 days to go!!!

Weigh in (87)

Damnitdamnitdamnitdamnit.

I refuse to cut and paste last week's post; short-cuts are not permitted here, I need to feel the pain of mini-failure (failette?). Yet again it's another pound on and now at 15 stone 10 pounds dead.

Arse.

Definitely suffering from the lack of a big run last Sunday; clearly what I am eating is just not healthy enough, and if I'm not pounding enough payment it's always going to be a bad week. So where did it go wrong?

Not blaming anyone (Clare; it's all your fault.......did I write that out loud?.....) but I went to see my sister for a 'treaty tea' of warm-up food from Marks and Sparks. It's probably a good job I didn't get to see the fat content of those dishes as I would probably have run screaming home in favour of a more healthy dish like......a deep-fried lump of lard...... In all honesty the fault is entirely mine (tell you something you don't know, right?). I've said before and I'll say it again, we are all in charge of what we chuck into our bodies, and if faced with something unhealthy we don't have to eat it. Sadly however, I did......a lot. May I say for the record it was blummin' lovely; but with less than seven weeks to go until my little jaunt round London time is running out to get the weight down.

So, the good news is that I will - I WILL I WILL - be running this Sunday, and all being well will be able to get a few runs in during the week too. If I can stay away form the treaty teas then maybe that will do the trick.

You may be detecting a slightly less than significant amount of concern in my voice; I can't deny it, as I still FEEL good. I wouldn't say I feel racing-snake thin, but I certainly don't feel like my weight is going up; even if it is. Maybe it's that muscle-weighs-more-than-fat thing, but I'm not clutching too hard to that particular straw. I just need to have a 'normal' (for me) week of good health, good exercise and good sleep; finishing with a good weigh in next Friday.

One thing if for sure, I don't think I can afford another wrong 'un. Come on Blaydon, don't quit now I'm so close.

......forty-fours.....droopy drawers.....

Weigh in (86)

I could kind of see this coming. One pound on, weighing in at 15 stone 9 pounds; damn it.

Slipped again I'm afraid. Fallen off the wagon - again!! - succumbing to cheese on and cookies with my Subways. Add to this missing an exercise session and that was enough to do the trick. The trick being making a pound of flesh magically reappear! TA-DAAAAAAAAAA!!

As usual, no excuses, but the sniffles have knocked my willpower, not to mention my control. As if the usual challenges associated with running a long way aren't enough, I am now having to deal with a rebellious body. It's letting me down big time at the moment, and it's getting to me. Can't deny it, I am feeling decidedly sorry for myself tonight. Got that 'WHAT ELSE DO I HAVE TO DO GOD?????!!' sort of feeling.

Other than that; life is peachy with a side of keen.......

Sorry if this turns non-fans of the sport off, but these weigh-ins feel a lot like supporting a football team. You get on the scales/go to the match on a Friday evening/Saturday afternoon so full of hope for a good result; if you get it, great! if not....misery. The trauma however is short lived, as after the initial shock you are already looking forward, towards the next game/weigh-in; and hope grows again. I just hope that my weigh-ins prove a better bet than Stockport County!   

I suppose I should be grateful for the small mercy that it is only one pound on and nothing worse. All in all, not a good day........

Re-grouping tomorrow......I hope.......!

......51 days until the you know where, you know what......

Weigh in (85)

You know how I said it would be a dark day if I put on weight again this week? Well, it's looking distinctly bright out there! Yes, by George, by Jiminy and by Jingo, he's got it! Now weighing in at 15 stone 7.6 pounds. So rounding up to 8 pounds means a loss of four (count them with me......one....two.....buckle my shoe.....three.....FOUR... think I might lose some more!) pounds. Get in there!!

Happy? Yes...very. Relieved? Abso-flamin'-lutely! Now not only do I know I can do it, I know what I need to do to do it. A four pounds loss may be a bit extreme; but as the exercise distances increase so to does the need to have less load on the legs. Even I have to admit that the repeated exercise - particularly the endurance sessions - has made my pins extremely lean and looking good, but I still don't want to see them give way like the legs of a cartoon horse when a fat cowboy sits on top of him. Having so much less weight on them will be of huge benefit. Keep going at this rate and I'll be sub-fourteen stone before race-start!! Not likely, but it would be interesting to know how I would look and feel at that sort of weight (I suspect, 'good' and 'great' respectively!); it's secondary school - and early secondary school at that - when I was that lean.

It's going to be a busy weekend by all accounts (would you believe I have already done my packing for work on Monday morning?!!); off to see my ol' Mum tomorrow which is most of the day; then Sunday is a record-breaking (as opposed to record-equalling) run. I fear this weekend is going to race by and I will be typing my pre-return-to-work post before I know it. Looking forward to a Monday night off at the hotel; I send a bit of Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Tax Inspector (that's right isn't it?) on DVD.

But, that's later. Tonight is a night for celebration; I confess that I might even treat myself to a Chinese Takeaway. I had one last week so I think I'm safe!

....58 days to go!!

Weigh in (84)

Okay, this is now moving away from annoying territory and moving into embarrassing. I feel I need to apologise for this, to you; not to myself as apologising to my self for something I have done is just a little bit out there (you know me, as sane as the next man.....). Weighing in tonight at 15 stone 11.6 pounds, rounding me up to one on at fifteen twelve. The utter ridiculousness of it. A man in training for the London Marathon; running an average of twenty miles a day, and putting on weight.

So, a genuine apology to you, and a promise that I am going to do the best I can to find out what I am doing wrong. Let's face it, there must be something, or more likely a number of things. Speaking of which.....

There are specifics such as not eating breakfast - I think I may have said that before....last week - and generally eating too much of the wrong stuff, but it all comes under the same general category; and it's a category we have met, and 'conquered' before. We've had our 'Star Wars', and we have moved on to 'The Complacency Strikes Back'.

What an idiot I have been to let this happen again; to once more have the arrogant presumption that all the exercise I am doing gives me free rein to eat like the Hungry Hungry Caterpillar and still turn into a butterfly. It is laughable that I am struggling to recall what I ate this week; and how can you eat sensibly when you have lost control of your diet. Truth? Managed the hotel breakfast only once this week, two subways; one of which is a footlong Meatball Heart Attac.....errrrr.....Marinara, and with each was a packet of crisps and three-pack of gooey cookies. Finally on my healthy instant mash and tuna night (actually not that unhealthy) I actually manage to work my way through a sixpack of crisps (in case you were wondering.....very unhealthy).

Good grief. On reflection it's a miracle I only put on one pound.

I don't think the two subways thing is all that bad if I am sensible with it; but I need to control all the stuff that goes with it - the crisps, the cookies - and I need to control it quickly. I simply can't afford to have another week like this. Even a break even next week would be better than a gain.

Quite by coincidence (no such thing?!), I heard a beautiful and extremely insightful phrase on the TV not long after the weigh in (and you can guess how I was feeling at the time can't you?). It gave me hope......

"What's impossible becomes hard, what's hard becomes easy, what's easy....becomes beautiful"

So many things can be learned from this; it is worth attempting the impossible, perseverance is a good thing, beauty can come from unusual places and so on. For me it is a map, and I've realised I'm not where I thought I was. Here's me thinking I was comfortably within the 'easy' zone, but in actual fact I've not left 'hard' yet. Knowing that will hopefully give me the focus that I need. If I don't pay attention to what I'm eating, I am going to be in deep trouble.

......65 days to go.......

Weigh in (83)

....72 days and counting....

Hmmmm, head officially being scratched; it's 15 stone 9, UP to 15 stone 11 pounds. 2 pounds on. Annoyed? Well.....yes actually. Don't worry though; it's not you, it's me.

It seems I am having to re-learn nutrition around the new routine as it's still clearly not right. A week in which I run over twenty miles (five of which were right before the weigh in) and still not losing weight?!!!

So what is happening? Okay, a four pound loss like last week might be as unnatural as the big gains I've had and almost ignored; so this might be classed as a 'settling down'. Clutching at straws much? It just seems like the results are fluctuating way too much lately. So here's what I'm going to do.....

Eat breakfast - for much of this week I admit, I have not. Is it really that much of a big deal that your digestive system needs to wake up when you do? (breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince, dinner like a pauper and all that). If the not having breakfast is a significant factor in gaining weight, then that would explain a lot!

Eat lunch - hmmmmm, the penny might be slowly starting to drop. The no breakfast thing was this week combined with running out of cup-a-soups at work. So you know the whole king-prince-pauper thing? Well it's been more like 'breakfast like a pauper, lunch like a pauper, dinner like an uber-king' I'm not sure that this is the perfect recipe for weight loss.

So positives.......positives?......to be honest I really can't think of any....

......HE LIED......!!

I'm still feeling good! An eleven mile big run up and down the rolling hills of Lancashire, on marathon training schedule. Plus the weight does not seem to be causing too much of a problem for the knees and ankles. Not only this, work is going well, with body and mind managing well through the 4 hour commuting on a Monday morning.

So it is going to be some fine tweaking next week; upping the long run to twelve miles this Sunday. Surely the amount of exercise I am doing now should be more than enough compensation for the odd tricky meal? If next Friday is bad news then I'm in such trouble; the like of which I have not experienced since lying about my history homework to Mr. Mitchell; I was a very, VERY bad boy.

One thing is for sure; it's going to be a nervy one! 

Weigh in (82)

Oooonleeeee; 78 days, from Londooooon!!
(that’s Londooooon as in ‘London with a long final syllable’ not Londoooon as in ‘Briga….’)

A slight variation to the routine this week with Strictly taking up last night the weigh-in was bumped to Saturday. Also, if the truth be known I was living in a little village called ‘Procrastination’ (you know the place; it’s just down the road from ‘Avoidance’, on the outskirts of ‘Toonervous’). I remember that old feeling of having what I think has been a good week and expecting to have lost weight, but extremely nervous in case the familiar pattern of weight gain continues. If it does then I would start to wonder how good I need to be to get back to winning weighs (see what I did there??).

As it turns out; number 82 (weigh-in) and 78 (days to go) has been a roaring success. Now weighing in at 15 stone 9.4 pounds; rounding down to 9. Now, let me see; taking into account last week’s 15 stone 13 pounds makes……….dragging this out aren’t I?.....hey, cut me some slack; it’s been a while…..a loss of phwoarrrr pounds; now that really is more like it!

It was as much with a sense of relief as a sense of warm, fluffy-bunny-feeling when I got off the scales. I’m not arrogant enough to claim to have ‘turned the corner’, but it is nice to get back to a successful week.

So, 4 pounds down, training on schedule, and asides from some serious nerves about getting out on the road tomorrow for an 11 mile run am feeling all in all pretty good!

I’m sure that equilibrium-threatening challenges are just round the corner; but for now I am just going to sit back on my slightly less heavy rear, and enjoy the evening!! 

Weigh in (81)

.......86 days to go......

Okay, we have some good news and some bad news. You can guess the bad.....yes I am now 15 stone 12.6 pounds, rounding up to 13 pounds which - most definitely unlucky for me - is classed as one pound on. Looking at the facts this is obviously not good news. It has been some time since I lost last weight (??!), the routine-disrupting events of the last month have made exercising and healthy eating very difficult. It is never going to be a satisfactory excuse for putting on weight, but is nevertheless still a fact. The most devastating thing however has been the snow, curtailing any chances of running with the Spartans last week.

So why am I not worried?

Okay, maybe I am a little perturbed; but that's not the same thing! Firstly I am feeling pretty well, and the early morning commute on a Monday is still not taking too much toll (preparation is the key...packing the car the night before....not to mention going to bed at about 9pm Sunday night!). Apart from that, there is still plenty to be optimistic about. Yes it is still a weight gain, but taking into account that this has been a week where my only exercise was the 9 mile treadmill run on Sunday, and......ahem.....hushes to a whisper.......I had two Chinese takeaways (Friday and Sunday....I didn't tell you about the second one did I?....bad bad BAD Adrian for doing it, and you know I'm BAD, I'm BAD, you know it, for not telling you, oh, and BAD BAD Leroy Brown was a fantastic hit for Jim Croce......don't laugh...you'll thank me when you listen to it.....); to only put on 0.6 pounds means that I am doing something right. If I can get a couple more runs in during week ahead (and with the forecasted thaw this is very likely), and avoid the fried rice (can possibly even afford to have the one, just - note to self - not the two) then surely I should be in heavy (or should that be light?!) credit when it comes to weigh in 82?

It's the boost I need with the dwindling days before lift off. It will come as no surprise to you that it has proved to be a bit of a struggle to adapt to life around the new job (the new job itself has gone reeeeeeally well, and my boss is brilliant......but my boss' brother is quite incredible......hark at me; anyone would think I am just saying that because he reads my blog......), but if - with the 'new' routine - I can have a successful week, I know I will have hit the right formula. I won't repeat it exactly, but it can form the basis of the push needed to get down to fourteen stone, and get up to 26 miles....

.....at least, that's the plan........!!

Weigh in (80)

In case you were suspicious as to the frequency of my weigh-ins, you have got a very, fully-fledged, sod of a good point. I promise you that hopping on the scales has been a regular part of my usual Friday night routine; the trouble is I haven't been posting about it quite so religiously, so this one is about last Friday's result. Hopefully by this Friday we will be back on schedule.

There are strange things happening at the moment; this time however I am not complaining - not one eensy weensy bit - as I'm now 15 stone 12 pounds! This represents a weight loss of 5 pounds?!!

Fear not, I am not going to get too carried away by this good news; much as I didn't get that hung up over last week's sixteen stone plus result. I have yet to work out what is going on though; maybe my physical self is still adjusting to the new routine that my mental self is starting to settle into? Another problem is that my weigh in times have not been exactly the same (last week was post-dinner yum-yums, this week was pre-yum-yum). Whether all, either, or none of the above I'm satisfied that this figure is more representative of where I am, and gives me a lot more hope in my ability to knock off the miles and of course the pounds in the coming months.

Positivity aside for a second - out of character though it may be - I am falling into a bit of a metphiorrical bear trap (no, not the one of not being able to spell). I am mentally thinking (I wrote that, and blimey it made me laugh....so I'm going to leave it in!) that as I am doing so more strenuous exercise at the moment, I can get away with eating, not bad; but certainly badder. Must cut this out; the training will certainly require more calories; but this is also an opportunity to really do some weight clobbering. The weekly routine needs a bit of fine-tuning (ironically it's the weekends when I'm back at home which are proving problematic; but a friend has given me some recipes involving pulses which are apparently super-healthy...love the fact that increasing my pulse intake helps reduce my pulse......chortle chortle.....), but I feel I am almost adjusted to it. Basically we are good to go. But I still have to 'go'!!

The snow is a blow this week, and it does worry me that the only likely exercise I will be getting this week will be the gym run on Sunday, with the possible addition of a swim on Saturday. It won't do my prospects of losing weight any good as those sessions don't come until after I've weighed in. Mind you, the weigh my wayt has been fluctuating of late, I might end up twelve and a half stone............

......and then I'll wake up and have my Rice Crispies......

.......89 days to go........

Weigh in (79)

You know how I said I was worried about this week's weigh in? Fearing it would show the result of some very VERY naughty eating over the last couple of weeks? Well, regretfully this is not where I say.....'and after all that, I am pleasantly surprised!!'......it is certainly a case of fear realisation.  Weighed in at 16 stone 3 pounds, which actually constitutes a weight gain of 7 pounds??...in a week???

I am well aware that denial is not just a river in Africa, however I do smell a bit of a rodent here (and yes, these are clean sheets on my bed); half a stone in seven days?? It seems an unnaturally high gain. Nevertheless, this is the score on the scales and I have to accept it. Without doubt it's a blow; just as breaking the sixteen stone barrier going down was a significant step in the right direction, this is just as significant a step the wrong way.

There may be issues such as the fact I am weighing myself on a different day to the first 70 weigh ins, and further issues that I am weighing in on a non-exercise day (Tuesday weigh ins used to be immediately after a gym session). I am no expert but bodily things are sure to be slightly different. These are things not to be dwelt upon, what does need attention is what I am going to do now. The countdown has begun to London, and I don't fancy my feet's chances of training for let alone managing to run 26 miles with sixteen stones of lard on top of them.

So that previous schedule I had only a short while ago? that's already history. NO more full English breakfasts (I found out that porridge is on the hotel menu, that's the way to go.....can't wait to see the look on the waitress' face when I ask for it!!). Extra vigilance with my evening meals, and maintaining my exercise regime. If I can do all these things - particularly with the increasing road-running distances there is no reason why I can't re-break the sixteen stone mark next time, and crack on towards the next milestone.

The strange thing is, that I am still feeling good. Stamina levels are high (still not feeling too much fatigue at the Stevenage commute). The running is going well, and I am comfortably knocking off five miles after work. The seven mile Sunday run is a bit more tricky, but the hills are pretty brutal in and around chilly Ramsbottom. That's a good level at this stage, and if I can keep that regime going - adding a mile per week - I should be ready come April 21st. So it's not doom, and maybe only cause for a little teeny tiny bit of gloom.

I have to do two things here; first of all I need to accept the situation as it is, not moan about it; and secondly I need to back myself. I know if I execute the plan above (which, let's face it, has been pretty much the plan since this whole thing started) I will be fine; and I'm saying that with total conviction. No doubts.

93 days to go........ 

Weigh in (78)

I think things are reaching a bit of a routine...and not before time. Still commuting to Stevenage once a week (as if anyone would do it twice?!!), but am slowly managing to gain control of both exercise and nutrition; you might not think it by what I am still eating, but things were so out of control over the last month that there is going to be a bit of an odyssey (that's posh word for 'journey'....just call me 'Thesaurus Man!!!' to get back on the path of the straight, narrow and righteous (hey, spelled that right first time....result!!). The plan of action which I will run up the flagpole and see who salutes it before checking we are all singing from the same songsheet.............is.......

Monday 

• early start (4am) with a bagel or toast before leaving
• cup-a-soup at work for lunch
• beginners running group with the Spartans
• healthy-type Subway (they do exist!)

Tuesday

• hotel breakfast, cereal, beans on toast
• cup-a-soup at work for lunch
• longer run with the Spartans (in the slowest group but planning to move up)
• some creative purchasing from the supermarket....I know it's not ideal but instant mash and tuna does taste really nice....might even bring something with me from up t'north

Wednesday

• hotel breakfast, tempted to have the one full English and see if I can get away with it
• cup-a-soup at work for lunch
• no running, rest day
• eating in the hotel restaurant, should be able to pick a healthy option...no pudding....one beer

Thursday

• hotel breakfast, toast and cereal
• cup-a-soup at work for lunch
• core strength training back at home; push, sit - and afterwards - try and get - ups
• something on toast

Friday

• back at home, porridge for breakfast
• tinned soup for lunch
• light run for about half an hour or so, or badminton social night
• proper healthy tea (cooking enough for the weekend)

Saturday

• possible swim in the morning if I don't have anything on (skinny dipping??!!)
• porridge brekkie
• light lunch
• rest day from running
• more healthy tea (remainder of the pan of 'stuff' from Friday)

Sunday

• porridge brekkie
• the all important and ever increasing long run!
• light lunch
• might weaken and have a Chinese
• early night for the early Monday morning start!

I think this is reasonable, but like everything else it is a work in progress and I can adapt it if 'things' don't work.

So why is it so important to get back into a habit? It's simple...I'm not exercising enough, and I'm not eating well enough. Everything has been far too erot..(chance would be a fine thing)....errr.....erratic and I need to take hold of both what I'm doing and what I'm scoffing. The deadline for the marathon is not getting further away - funny that - and I don't want to be in the 15 stones when it comes along.

Which brings me to the bad news of another pound on.....leaving me at 15 stone 10 pounds.

To be honest I am less worried about this, and more worried about a backlash from the dodgy eating of the last few weeks. I am prepared for delayed reaction bad news as - knowing what I have been eating - I do not think this is one bullet I will be able to dodge come next weigh in. Brace yourselves....

Putting weight on is not good news, but as long as plans are in place to ensure I can reverse the trend then all is far from lost; and that is what I have done. The week schedule should work, and my training plan leading up to THE BIG ONE is ready to rock. All I have to do is stick to them..........    

Weigh in (77)

Considering I chickened out of the weigh in last week (full English-itis) it was with some trepidation when getting on the scales. Activities (exercise, diet) have been very unroutine-ish of late (for reasons why, just see previous posts) so I honestly didn't know what to expect. It's two pounds on from the weigh in two weeks ago, leaving me at 15 stone 9 pounds.Could have been worse, but of course could have been better.

I am struggling with the diet, and the holidays have come as something of a regrouping relief. The fact that my week is now split 4 nights home/3 nights hotel is proving - I was going to say more, but to be honest - as difficult as expected. If it's not a Subway sandwich it's a meal at the hotel (where the chef decided to give me an extra portion of chocolate pudding.....in the interests of North-South relations, how could I refuse?!!.....okay, by saying 'no thank you'.....but I regret to say, I didn't). I did make an effort to 'fashion' an evening meal, but it turned out to be a culinary disaster which I will not repeat here in case it puts you of eating......forever......

There is certainly hope however, as there is plenty of improvement I can bring to what I am eating; and I can use the Christmas break to plan my meals when I am doing the hotel thing (the odd healthy-option subway, one health-conscious meal at the hotel, maybe even cook something at home and bring it with me!). Add to this the fact that I have managed to establish a routine of running on both Monday and Tuesday evenings with the SPAAAAAAARTAAAANS means a two pound gain can quickly become a weight loss.

It's a weird thing about routine; you can't establish one until you know what you have to work with. After two official weeks in the official job I have enough to make a plan; it is far from impossible to 'make it work', and let's face it, with a marathon coming up in less than four months that is very good news indeed!!

The running is going well; and I will be packing up my 'gear' when I go off to my Mums later so I can put in a few miles in between turkey slices, bucks fizz and prezzies. Can't speak for how long the runs will be, but I just want to keep my hand (foot!) in before the real hard labour begins in the new year.  (Why do I have the feeling that the time between now and April 21st is going to evaporate mighty quickly?!!).

I am looking forward to Christmas; it kinda feels I have been holding my breath over the last month and I can finally exhale, relax, enjoy time without rushing, and then set my stall out for 2013 and all the challenges and hopefully successes it will bring!!

Bring it on........

Weigh in (73), (74), (75), (76)

Yes, yes, yes......blog posts are like London buses......blah blah yada blah.....

Still playing catch up with everything at the moment; but another blog post means progress; I think!
There are now - count them with me....one, two, buckle my shoe - four weigh-ins to catch up on. I would love to say that my lack of updating is no cause for concern, but as I am concerned that would be a scorching (literally) case of liar liar pants on fire.

By now you should be aware of the new job; the working week of which is travelling down from Manchester to Stevenage at daft o'clock (GMT) on a Monday morning; hotelling it for three nights and then heading back up to northern civilisation (NOT an oxymoron) on Thursday night. It is not sustainable, but something I can do until hopefully both parties (me and company) are in agreement that it is a good match and I can move darn sarf on a permanent basis. Looking good so far!

So; what was a successful routine of gym Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday, with the occasional badminton match is now all over the place.....in actual fact let's be honest here; said routine is shot to pieces. On top of this my food intake is now so much more difficult to control. The hotel I am staying at has a restaurant, and although there are other places to eat they are all under the blanket of fast-food. Just to add a cuttingly acidic insult to life-threatening injury.....the hotel does a fantastic full English breakfast.

I am struggling, and need to find a way to deal with what I am eating; I need to 'make it work'. Fortunately I only have two weeks of this new regime until Christmas, providing me with time enough to devise a plan which manages my diet successfully. It is a plan I desperately need as there are only so many healthy-option Subway sandwiches I can eat of an evening before it drives me crazy; plus during my first week I had a full English every morning.......do I have to say 'not good' or can we just take it as read?

Is that all the trouble?....well.... no it's not. When I do eventually get home I am clueless of what to buy. With essentially only three full days I am either buying too much from the supermarket -  and throwing stuff away - or too little and resorting to takeaways (my first curry last weekend, slipping into old and bad habits......I know I know).

Okay.....that's all the trouble now, I promise.

So enough of the procrastination, what's the score? Well, as Tuesday nights are now away from home, in the interests of consistency I have moved the weigh ins to Thursday nights after the drive home. Here goes......

Weigh in (73) 15 stone 10 pounds
Weigh in (74) 15 stone 4 pounds
Weigh in (75) 15 stone 7 pounds
Weigh in (76) Wimped out after all those full Englishes

So on a positive note I have not done a huge amount of damage; the weight is still in the 15 stonesies. Granted if I had managed to keep the rate of weight loss from post great north, I would probably be at my target weight (whatever that is!) by now, but considering what is going on at the moment it is a case of damage limitation and so far I think I am managing to manage it (good luck or good judgement? I suspect the former......). I confess to being so worried about the most recent weigh in that I chickened out....I swear to you it will not happen again. Good or bad, I will always get on those scales. Feel pretty embarrassed at admitting my cowardice; powerful incentive not to do it again.

I know what you're thinking - I do.....really! - is there any good news? As a matter of fact, there is. I still feel strong, and even though I am writing this post at gone 11pm on a day which started at 4am, I feel good. What's more, I have taken my first step towards a new routine. I say step; tonight there were actually three and a half miles worth of steps. The guys at work - many of which are runners themselves - pointed me in the direction of a running club which makes good use of the psychopath... ....errrrr....cycle paths of Stevenage. It is freezing cold, tiring, hard, and I have to - once more - negotiate the 'go somewhere on your own and try to make a go of it in a group of strangers' phenomenon, but after my second session tonight I am proud to say I am officially a Fairlands Valley Spartan (I am itching to find a way of yelling 'THIS...IS....SPARTAAAAAAAAAA!!!!' at someone). It feels really good to get out on the road, and even better to do it with such a fantastic group of people. There are lots of experienced marathon runners amongst them, and they have kindly offered to make me a training schedule for the 'big one' next April; particularly after they found out about 'the story'. I am starting to believe this might actually happen, even with all the other happenings which happen to be happening at the moment. There is hope; big, strong, mighty hope. So please, keep the faith. Back out there for more of the same tomorrow night!! Oh, and my sister has bought me a flash new pair of running shoes; only for best though......!

I look a right Charlie in my outdoor running gear though........! Why do I sense a self-deprecating photograph coming on....?!

Weigh in (72)

You know those action movies where a guy or gal drives a car down a hill to find out that someone has cut the brakes? Life kinda feels like that at the moment; it's moving so fast and I have no chance of stopping it. All I can do is steer, pray there are no hairpin bends, and wait for the road to level out and the car to slow down. The irony in my particular analogy is that I drove for the hill in the full knowledge that the brakes were banjaxed. I knew this was coming, and terrifying and slightly out of control it may be, I have no desire to stop the car.

This particular post is not the place to explain in detail what the flippin' 'eck I am talking about - it's about the weigh in - but I promise I will. Suffice it to say that the week has been a struggle, as has my control of both diet and exercise levels. The former has been 'ok'; the sort of ok which would be great if I was still visiting the gym three times a week....which brings me on to the latter. I had a badminton match on Friday night and, well; that has been about it. Three weeks with no gym at all. Not good, especially when considering the London Marathon looms on an albeit distant horizon.

Yes I am still shaking off the sniffles - they have not completely gone away - but they are sufficiently absent for it to be a very poor excuse. I'm just out of the rhythm; as a rhythm is what it had become (almost instinctual). Granted, I may have been knocked out of it by circumstances, but one thing is for sure; I need to get back into it again as quickly as possible.

I know what you're thinking....'he's put on weight again'....as surely all this is a precursor to bad news; WRONGGGG! I came in at 15 stone 8.2 pounds, which is a 3 pound loss. Good news yes, but I feel a bit of a fraud as I don't feel I've earned it. I think the previous week's weigh in was inflated due to the night out - and meal - I had on weigh-in night, whereas this week was the traditional pre-dinner routine. I'm shaking it off though, as although I have been fluctuating, it is still not doing massive amounts of damage to the hard work I have done over the last eighteen months (weight-wise at least, not so sure about the first gym visit back). There is still time to lose weight, and still time to train for London.

I fear that the hardest part of the journey is yet to come; made even harder by recent developments, but it's very simple; the harder the task, the greater the achievement. I'm not going to give in, and I AM going to do this.

Whether by random chance or by destiny, the Great North Run DVD I ordered came through last weekend, just when I needed it. I saw the whole spectacle; and the images and feelings came rushing back, as did the feelings of nervousness, participation, pain, and glory. It reminded me that I WAS THERE, and I DID IT; and I will do it London too.

It is going to be tough though........

Weigh in (70)

It is with a heavy heart, as well as regretfully with a much heavier body that I bring myself to write this post; but them's the rules of blogclub - besides of course 'YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT BLOGCLUB' - that I have to be honest and give the rough with the smooth. Care to have a punt on which of these you're getting today boys and girls?!! It is a whopping FOUR pounds on, weighing me in at 15 stone 7.8 pounds (oh go on, let me round down just this once??.......worth a try; 15 stone 8 it is then).

Pause for gasp.......

I guess the positive thing (possibly the only positive thing!) is that once again it is not a surprise. I've been full of a cold all week and just can't seem to get it shifted. There have been no trips to the gym. I did try one evening, hoping to put into action the 'sweat it out of your system' principle; unfortunately I succeeded in the slightly less celebrated adage of 'sweating it even further in to your system'.

In addition to the sniffles I don't think I am over-dramatising things when I say that this has been the most unsettled week since way before Fatmantofitman was so much as a glint in its fathers eye. There was the regular stress which comes from being in a sales-related profession (targets to achieve, walls to beat your head against etc), but to compound things I have been presented with one of the biggest and toughest life-choices I have ever had. To protect the innocent (and some guilty too) I can't go into too much detail, but suffice it to say I stand at a major crossroads in the life of Adrian Blaydon (good job I haven't taken a wrong turn and ended up at someone else's junction....look right, look left, look right again.....yep....it's definitely mine). In one direction I have a road of comfort and familiarity which is very likely to lead to frustration and boredom in the not to distant distance; in the other I have a largely unknown road of upheaval and fear (not forgetting of course, hope), which may very likely lead to achievement, happiness, success and all round good stuff. Sounds like a no-brainer, but to consciously forsake comfort and choose the more difficult path that lies ahead - and risk it ultimately not turning into achievement, happiness, success and good stuff - is both an exciting and terrifying prospect.

At the risk of repeating repeating myself myself, it comes down to an all too regular occurring question....'Do I dare?' Am I prepared to make my life intentionally less comfortable in the short term for the successes it could bring, or do I not bother out of fear of failure, settling for the lot in life I currently have? I think I know my answer, but I am almost too scared to give it. Procrastination man.....that's me.

Although 'unsettled' in this case is not an entirely bad thing it - along with the cold - has taken away all my focus, and I have slipped into the old naughty ways again. Naughty way; they are always lurking; looking for their opportunity to take hold again. Maybe not completely fast-food dominant, but a Chinese takeaway earlier in the week and a trip to Macdonalds on Monday night (large Big Mac Meal, large McChicken sandwich meal......yes.....all eaten by me) are hardly contributory factors to a healthy balanced diet are they? Not good is not an exaggeration. Previously I have eaten badly while still going to the gym and got away with it, and on occasion I have missed the gym while still eating well and dodged a bullet; now we know (as if we didn't already) what happens when exercise and diet go to pot.

So what now? Is the challenge in jeopardy?

NO!! I REFUSE TO LET IT GET THE BEST OF ME

There will be a degree of damage limitation required over the next week; and possibly the week after. I can't see myself making it to the gym for at least another week. It's a worry but the damage I could do by getting back on track too early doesn't bear thinking about. I need to eat well; being a bit poorly and losing my ability to exercise does not give me an excuse to give up on my diet aswell (that was kind of how I felt this week). I of course need to make a decision with regards to the above crossroads, but most of all I need to find some peace. My brain is awash with all thoughts of sorts (??!) and I need to find a way to quiet it. I'm not totally sure what I am going to do to achieve that, but I suspect it will involve a very hot bath (topped up regularly by careful big-toe dexterity) and a Kindle which contains that bird with the dragon tattoo.

Don't worry, I am far from beaten........