....70 days to go.....that's 10, I repeat, 10 weeks...! It's beginning to look, a lot, like, pa-nic.... 

You know that a distance becomes really long when it is even a bit of a journey by car; and twelve miles is not a drive to be sniffed at. Running it however is a total doddle........ahem......

I tell you guys; these long runs take it out of you. The physical side is obvious, but mentally it is almost as tough, and takes you through the whole gamut of emotions......

Phase One
The mental fortitude needed first thing in the morning to get up, get the kit on, and get out (in all but the most impassable of conditions) is considerable. I am now at the stage where each Sunday run is one mile longer than the last, and with this knowledge the doubts start to sneak in there; is this the extra mile I can't do? Is this the day when the dream dies? Is this the day when I realise the truth; that I really CAN'T 'do' the London Marathon? This fear of failure gives volume to the voice which is egging you to just have the day off, sit and watch a bit of telly. If you don't try, there is no way you can fail eh?

While this internal battle is going on, I am on autopilot; gearing up, stretching, stocking up on fluids, re-checking the route. The mind fights back, telling me that the only 'can't' which I am allowed to use is 'I have come so far; and I CAN'T possibly give up now'. A louder voice resonates in my head 'Adrian; just get out there and do it'.

Battle won......  

Phase Two
The run itself, finding a pace that's comfortable; trying not to think about how long I have been running for (usually not long enough!), and how much further I have to go (usually too far!!). Switching the mind between that calm, almost meditating place which lets the miles go by unnoticed, and the alertness of remembering your route, controlling your pace, being aware of your body, not crashing into people, and making sure cars don't crash into you!

It is ironic that during the most physically taxing part of the run, I can actually find the most peaceful mental state; and I don't only mean while running. I find a level of calm which normal life rarely affords. I love that feeling. There are people I am sure to whom the prospect of being left alone with their thoughts is a terrifying thought (maybe even thinking about being left alone with their thoughts is a terrible thought, maybe even thinking about thinking about being.......) but for me, peace of mind is a precious thing; it de-frags my brain and makes room for the week ahead.

As the end of the route approaches, I seek distraction to avoid thinking about how long there is left to run. Contemplating what I am going to have for lunch, looking at the lovely Lancashire scenery (sheep......a hill......another sheep.....another hill.....), listening to music (you should see my arm movements to 'Ooh Aaah; Just A Little Bit' by Gina G, and 'Jai Ho' by The Pussycat Dolls....macho image?.......what macho image??!!).

Almost there.....

Phase Three
Coming home. Those last few steps to the finish (usually at my front door). Sheer relief, sheer complete and utter elation. Punching the air. Looking at the stopwatch to convince myself that I have indeed been running for over two hours, as I can't quite believe it. Walking around slightly awkwardly, reflecting on what I have just done, confidence high, tired but feeling so strong; and for that glorious few minutes there is nothing I can't do.

That was how it was today (and hopefully how it will be next Sunday....and the Sunday after that). 12 miles under the belt; made all the more challenging by the fact it was in the middle of a blizzard!!

Often we don't know the most memorable moments of our lives as they happen' but when running uphill, with the biting cold and snow pelting my face; I knew that this was one of the many moments which I will look back on when that marathon medal goes round my neck. I am beginning to realise now that anyone who gets that honour, has truly earned it.

Guilt-free feet up in front of the box this afternoon and an early night. Up at half past daft as usual tomorrow!!