Can this really be it?
It is at this moment unbelievable that after almost two years, it has come to this point; the evening before the morning after, when I will accomplish precisely what I set out to do. How many plans of much less ambition than this fall by the wayside due to lack of resolve, lack of conviction, or just plain bad luck; and yet here I sit in my - rather plush may I say - hotel room, contemplating the race of my life and possibly my greatest achievement to date.
So the big question is, how do I feel? Pretty good to be honest. It's been a weird few days. When tomorrow was in the distant distance, it was a case of as good as out of sight, was out of mind; then came the realisation over the last couple of weeks that this was really happening (mini panic, with a double scoop of 'yikes!'). Now however, so close to 'the gun' I just feel calm, focused, and ready to do the job.
I have no expectations of time, or of whether I am going to be able to run all the way. Of course I have hopes, but with no reference point all I can do is simply go with what my mind and body are telling me. Let's face it; both of these have got to be trusted if they have seen me this far.
The oh so twee phrase is 'everyone who crosses that start line is already a winner'. Twee, but true. I will cross that start line, thanks to the generosity of so many I will raise well over £1000 for a fantastic charity, I like to think I have even inspired a few people along the way. I have already succeeded, and there is immense comfort in that. As a wise man once said....the rest is just gravy.
I confess that my original intention was to end this blog on the day of the marathon, getting a friend to update their account of the run as a spectator; but I've changed my mind. It's only fair that come what may, I sign off properly next week. I owe it to any of you around the world who have been kind enough to share the journey to see it draw to a close in the right way.
So wish me luck; and I leave you with the final entry under 'words', the final subject of the month. By Theodore Roosevelt, these for me are quite possibly the most inspirational words I have ever heard. They have seen me through some of the darkest days of this challenge, and spurred me on whenever I have been in need. It is only fair that they are reserved for one of the final blogposts; they have become part of my sould, and I have pleasure in sharing them with you in the hope that they give you the same hope that they gave me.......
It is not the critic who counts;
not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles,
or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena,
whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood;
who strives valiantly;
who errs,
who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming;
but who does actually strive to do the deeds;
who knows great enthusiasms,
the great devotions;
who spends himself in a worthy cause;
who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement,
and who at the worst,
if he fails,
at least fails while daring greatly,
so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.
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