HO HO HO!!!! - Santa's On His Way

Well, it's already begun! As I type, Santa is delivering presents to all the good boys and girls of the Solomon Islands. (This information is being brought to you courtesy of Norad Santa; the only way to fly with the man of belly like a bowl full of jelly!). In less than twelve hours he will be doing the same across the UK before wending his way over to America (whomever it is who keeps checking in to the blog from the U.S. don't forget to leave out your milk and cookies!!).

Do you remember the simpler time of life when we believed in Father Christmas? We never questioned the illogic of one man living in the north pole delivering presents to every child on the planet, we just believed. Then, over time - and hopefully not too early - reality sets in,  and we realise the impossibility of the existence of the man. Those of us who have children relive the excitement from another perspective, seeing it from the outside; however said excitement is surely infectious. Although we say 'Christmas is for the kids'; we get a kick out of youngsters living in the world where the impossible becomes possible.

I remember when the penny finally dropped for me. If I was honest with myself I suspected for some time, but when the official truth came out it was a bit upsetting. Then my brother talked to me, and although I don't remember precisely what he said; I remember the gist of it, and as a result I am proud to say in total honesty, that I still believe in Santa Claus.

Is Father Christmas a corporeal being, flesh and bone, racing round the globe and delivering presents at 25 times the speed of light? I seriously doubt it. Saint Nicholas was indeed a real saint, noted for his kindness, generosity and good deeds - particularly to children - and it seems the legend took off from there. I would seriously doubt that the original little Saint Nick has even seen a reindeer, much less a flying one!

Santa may not by 'real', but he exists. What he represents is an idea, a feeling; he is the true spirit of Christmas. At times during Christmas we are Santa, at others we receive gifts from him, at all times we feel him. When a house is filled with laughter, Santa laughs; when a house is filled with love, Santa loves; when a house is filled with joy, Santa smiles. Oh yes my friends; he is real, he is very much alive, and I will always believe in him. 

I have never had 'the talk' with a child when they first realise the awful truth, but it is precisely this - an honest and truthful answer - which I would say to them. Rather than being an end to a dream, it is just a slight change to it; a change that hopefully will last a lifetime.

I truly wish that Santa lives happily in your homes, and that he brings you all that you could possibly wish for.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!

HO HO HO!!!! - The Single Life

I am a single man (ladies, form an orderly queue and take a number), and very happy to be so. Don't get me wrong, I would much prefer to be in a stable (holding a box of frankincense....see what I did there?!!), loving, and life-long relationship, but until that Miss Ying to this Mr Yang shows up (my money is on number 34) I am not just going to 'make the best' of the bachelor life, I am going to enjoy it. There are lots of perks about being on your own, perks which are given up when entering into a relationship (yes, you usually gain more - different - perks than you lose (not least of which is a snog from time to time!); so you are better off, but hey.... glass half full single guy talking here!). The decision making process is much simpler (thinking for one rather than two), and on those days when you have such an arse of a day you just want to get home, sit down and not talk to anyone; you can.

There are times when I feel the solitude though, and none more keenly than at Christmas. Now don't worry; I'm not spending the entire holiday moping around the house singing 'lone-leeeeeeeee, I'm so lone-leeeeeee'. The symptoms are neither chronic nor constant, but there are moments during Christmas which would be lovely to share with a special someone. The Pretenders have it right when they sing......
 
'The lights on my tree,
I wish you could see,
I wish it ev'ry day,
Logs on the fire,
Fill me with desire,
To see you and to say,
That I wish you merry Christmas,
Happy new year too,
I've just one wish on this Christmas eve,
I wish I were with you.'

The thought of cuddling with that special someone in a decorated living room, candles everywhere, presents under the sparkling tree, bottle of champagne fizzing away, Christmas Carols on the stereo or (not and!) a movie playing (take your pick) on the TV does make me wistful. The peel of the bells while walking through the middle of Chester on the way to midnight mass at the cathedral does make me wish there was someone with their hand in mine to share it with. All of the above would be really, really lovely.

Sadly this year - as for a few Christmasses past - it is not to be; maybe next year (I'll give it to someone special!!). Wistful and wishing I may be, but I am also determined that those feelings will not make me settle for anything less than the right relationship with the right person, and I am absolutely sure I will know beyond doubt when that opportunity comes along. Until then, the Christmas movies and cathedral bells will be seen and heard by just me!

In case I don't have the chance to say it before the big day; I would like to wish everybody a VERY Merry Christmas. My genuine and heartfelt wishes are with you for happy holidays, and an exciting, joyful and of course healthy new year. In with my seasonal wishes, I would like to thank you. Whether this is the first time you have stumbled across this blog, or your umpteenth visit, you have become a part of it; and on this, the first and only full calendar year of the challenge, I am so grateful to you all. This challenge would have been impossible without you reading about it, and now we are so near its conclusion - and with what I hope will be your continued support - I am confident of a successful 2013 (and you know what THAT means!). 

Weigh in (77)

Considering I chickened out of the weigh in last week (full English-itis) it was with some trepidation when getting on the scales. Activities (exercise, diet) have been very unroutine-ish of late (for reasons why, just see previous posts) so I honestly didn't know what to expect. It's two pounds on from the weigh in two weeks ago, leaving me at 15 stone 9 pounds.Could have been worse, but of course could have been better.

I am struggling with the diet, and the holidays have come as something of a regrouping relief. The fact that my week is now split 4 nights home/3 nights hotel is proving - I was going to say more, but to be honest - as difficult as expected. If it's not a Subway sandwich it's a meal at the hotel (where the chef decided to give me an extra portion of chocolate pudding.....in the interests of North-South relations, how could I refuse?!!.....okay, by saying 'no thank you'.....but I regret to say, I didn't). I did make an effort to 'fashion' an evening meal, but it turned out to be a culinary disaster which I will not repeat here in case it puts you of eating......forever......

There is certainly hope however, as there is plenty of improvement I can bring to what I am eating; and I can use the Christmas break to plan my meals when I am doing the hotel thing (the odd healthy-option subway, one health-conscious meal at the hotel, maybe even cook something at home and bring it with me!). Add to this the fact that I have managed to establish a routine of running on both Monday and Tuesday evenings with the SPAAAAAAARTAAAANS means a two pound gain can quickly become a weight loss.

It's a weird thing about routine; you can't establish one until you know what you have to work with. After two official weeks in the official job I have enough to make a plan; it is far from impossible to 'make it work', and let's face it, with a marathon coming up in less than four months that is very good news indeed!!

The running is going well; and I will be packing up my 'gear' when I go off to my Mums later so I can put in a few miles in between turkey slices, bucks fizz and prezzies. Can't speak for how long the runs will be, but I just want to keep my hand (foot!) in before the real hard labour begins in the new year.  (Why do I have the feeling that the time between now and April 21st is going to evaporate mighty quickly?!!).

I am looking forward to Christmas; it kinda feels I have been holding my breath over the last month and I can finally exhale, relax, enjoy time without rushing, and then set my stall out for 2013 and all the challenges and hopefully successes it will bring!!

Bring it on........

HO HO HO!!!! - Movies pt 2

Sorry to leave you hanging before getting onto the utterly-must-see-doesn't-matter-if-it's-3am-I'm gonna-watch-it-and-every-time-I-drop-off-I-will-wake-and-rewind-the-bit-I've-missed (that is really what I call them) but the previous post was becoming a bit of a monster so it was time to make a lovely blogpost split (mmmmm, delicious!).

White Christmas
For some, the definitive Christmas movie; and I am not going to argue with them! (Now, anyone who says that 'Scrooged' with Bill Murray is the definitive Christmas movie I am sorry but I am going to have to grab you, carry you out the back and beat the crap out of you!). It may not be the first film to feature the title song (see last post) but the unlikely yet inspired pairing of Danny Kaye and - again! - Bing Crosby leaves its earlier counterpart very much in the shade.

In my book (metaphorical), for a film to be classed as 'good' it usually contains great songs, great lyrics (Irving Berlin....genius), a great story, a great script with some funny one-liners, great dancing; White Christmas elevates itself beyond this in the fact that it effortlessly ticks all of these boxes. Kaye's unique talent of being equally comfortable dancing as singing turn numbers like 'The Best Things Happen While You Dance' ('even guys with two left feet come out alright if the girl is sweet') into an utter joy, and likewise Crosby's unequalled crooning makes a pretty song such as 'Count Your Blessings' ('when I'm worried, and I can't sleep; I count my blessings instead of sheep' which incidentally I do by the way, and it really works!) into a song of true love, not to mention true wisdom.

Even if the White Christmas experience were limited to a collection of song and dance it would still be worthy of a place in my Christmas DVD collection, but interweaving them within a fantastic, festive story of friendship, hope, kindness, joy and love (if you haven't noticed a pattern in my films yet you really are a bit daft aintcha!?) leave me once again snivelling into my hanky. Now, usually I finish off with a line from the movie; the trouble is there are so many to choose from......!
'.....My dear partner, when what's left of you gets around to what's left to be gotten, what's left to be gotten won't be worth getting whatever it is you've got left.....'

okay, one more.......

'.....I'm not the marrying kind!'

'So what kind are you then??!'

'Well, I'm, uh, more the 'I-don't-mind-pushing-my-best-friend-into-but-I'm-scared-stiff-when-I-get-anywhere-close-to-it-myselfing' kind!'

I could go on, but instead I will leave you to discover it yourself; much more enjoyable that way!

Scrooge
This is the definitive Christmas movie starring Bill Murray.

......just  kidding......

The good news is that I can't really spoil this story, as surely everyone knows the Dickens classic of 'A Christmas Carol'. Cratchit, Tiny Tim, Fan, Alice, ghosts of Christmasses past, present and yet to come? If this isn't ringing any bells then do yourself a favour; get up, go to the shops and buy this film on DVD immediately. The story is so classic you can't go wrong with any of its many, many film interpretations (Muppetts, and.......oh go on, even Bill  Murray if you must) but without doubt the ultimate version of the Scrooge story is with Alistair Sim in the title role.

Yes it's in black and white, and yes, special effects which in 1951 were as jaw-dropping as Jurassic Park was to us are now looking extremely dated; but that's the thing about old movies, they rely totally and completely on their story, and their actors; and you can't get any better than Dickens and Sim.

Any of us that does a good deed for someone else understands it; the doer does not have to hang around for thanks, the deed itself is reward enough; it feeds the soul. Shakespeare understood it too....

The quality of mercy is not strained.
It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven,
Upon the place beneath.
It is twice blessed.
It blesseth him that gives and him that takes

What we witness while watching 'Scrooge' is a man who learns this simple truth. His initial motivation for doing good is selfish - to avoid the fate that the truly chilling ghost of Christmas yet to come shows him - but in an instant he starts to realise that it feels good, to do good. What a quite beautiful sentiment to build a story around don't you think?
'....can you forgive a pig-headed old fool for having no eyes to see with, no ears to hear with, all these years?'

It's a Wonderful Life
Yes, saving the best for last.......

What can I say about this movie? Words are failing me (for once). If I was forced to include Christmas films in my top five, this would have to be number one.

Meet George Bailey; the most extraordinary ordinary man of all time. He was born, he grew up, he moved into the family's struggling business, he fell in love, he got married, he bought a house, he had four children. Pretty boring huh? Well, George himself certainly thought so. All through his life, he had dreams; dreams of a full education, of seeing the world, of a career away from Bedford Falls......

'I'm shakin' the dust of this crummy little town off my feet and I'm gonna see the world. Italy, Greece, the Parthenon, the Colosseum. Then, I'm comin' back here to go to college and see what they know. And then I'm gonna build things. I'm gonna build airfields, I'm gonna build skyscrapers a hundred stories high, I'm gonna build bridges a mile long'

He never did any of that. At every dream-fulfilling crossroads something came along which forced him to sacrifice his dreams for the benefit of others. He never leaves Bedford Falls, and the family business is the only career he ever knows. For George, he equates falling short of these ambitions, with life failure. As the trials and tribulations put before him become more and more brutal, he starts to think the unthinkable; that his existence on this earth from beginning to end has been so utterly worthless, and that life would be better without him, or worse still, that the whole world would be a better place if he had never been born.

Just imagine that for a moment before we continue..........horrible isn't it?

Right at the moment when he needs it most, he gets help in the unlikely form of a wingless guardian angel. He brings George a heavenly gift. Clarence Odbody (AS2; angel, second class) allows him to see what the world would be like if he had never existed. His town, his house, his friends, his mother, his wife, his little brother, his non-existent children, all changed, for one reason, and one reason only; that the influence of one man's life has been completely removed from existence.

I don't think there is anyone who would not be tempted by this; scary though the prospect might be, wouldn't we all like to see what would have happened to our friends, our family, the world, if we had never been around to influence them? Would they have been better off? worse? or would the extraction of your life be no more than a blip on the universe? Frustratingly it is something we will never know. I equate it to being stuck in motorway traffic and trying a longer diversion to get home quicker; you will just never know if you would have been better off staying put. No matter how much some people might say they don't care, it surely is a question which taps into all our psyches.

So what happens after George Bailey gets a glimpse of a George Baileyless world? Look, I've spoiled too much already; all I will urge you to do is watch it; ride it out. Get through the stomach-churning drama of grief, desperation and wrath, and I promise you it will be worth it. Oh, and don't forget your hankies......lots.......and lots........of hankies.......

'Strange, isn't it? Each man's life touches so many other lives. When he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?'

Okay, not so lost for words after all!!!!

HO HO HO!!!! - Movies

If you recall a previous subject of the month where I gave you my top five films of all time, there was a proviso inserted (and boy did it make my eyes water) that Christmas movies would be omitted. Yes, it was a total cheat so that through those posts and this one, I can cover more of one my favourite subjects......fillums!!

Each year come beginning of December, most people trudge up to their attic, down to their cellar, or out to their shed to bring down, up or in the boxed-up Christmas decorations. I am no different, but buried in the box underneath the tinsel and baubles is my collection of Christmas DVD's; of all the Christmas adornments these, for me, are the most precious.

It is always my intention to watch them all during the big day build-up; but sadly some usually get missed out due to the fact that I spend so long saving them for later that there are no longer enough hours in the days before Christmas to watch them, even if I do so back-to-back with scarcely a loo break in between. Certain movies however, I almost HAVE to watch or else it is just not Christmas.

So here they are; the Adrian Christmas film collection. Like those flicks described before I will try not to give too much away about the plot; or at least I will try and warn you if the spoiler is doing too much spoiling! More time will be given for the must-see films......

Holiday Inn
Don't let the black and white put you off, it is a lovely movie; and the first time - unlike the film of  the same name - we hear Irving Berlin's song 'White Christmas'. Instead of Bing Crosby being paired with Danny Kaye, a considerably younger looking (still big ears though) Bing shares the stage with the great Fred Astaire. There are some tricky, distinctly non-pc moments which whilst acceptable in the 1940's would certainly not be permitted nowadays. If you can see past those little transgressions it is a heart-warming movie of music, dance, peace and yes; true love.

The Holiday
This one crept up on me unexpectedly. Let's be honest here, armed with the front cover of the DVD and the first ten minutes of the film you can probably predict the entire movie from start to finish; but surely the fact that I like to watch it year after year renders that irrelevant? Two unlucky in love women (one in America, the other in Surrey) agree to a house swap, and guess what these two unlucky in LOVE ladies go on to find?!!! Care to take a wild guess?!
I love it. Love the predictable ending, love the sweet old man living next door, love the woman who is a leading lady but plays the part of the best friend (great line), love Jack Black singing film theme tunes at the top of his voice in the middle of a video store, love the woman adjusting to Surrey village traffic, love the love stories, but most of all I love the insight into bad relationships which are allowed to perpetuate even though the badness is as plain as the nose on Jack Black and Kate Winslett's faces.

"Amanda Woods........welcome back!!!!"

Bernard and the Genie
Hard to find on DVD; Lenny Henry as the genie in a slightly surreal but charming made-for-TV, BBC movie. Rowan Atkinson is fantastic as the nasty boss, plus lots of star cameos appearing unexpectedly to make you - ok, me! - giggle. Written by Richard Curtis which is as good a reference as it needs really.

Love, Actually
Do you know, I only just realised; I have two Christmas movies in this collection which are written by Richard Curtis; meet number two. This one being much more famous.
Eight stories of love in all its many guises; love lost, unrequited love, lust, love betrayed, love which conquers all, love when you least expect it, simple love and love prevented. Whatever story you relate to the most (possibly more than one) there is something there for everybody, and it is a true tour de force of British acting.
So what is the story I relate to the most? I love all of them, but I think the unrequited one is quite beautiful, and something I have had experience of. When you watch it, look for the moment when the secret is finally out, and he walks out of the house, turns to walk back in and talk to her, turns to walk away, turns back to the house, finally resolving to leave. It is brilliantly done, and although a wordless piece of action it speaks volumes. I can hear exactly what he is saying.
....."Enough..........enough now........."

Nativity!
Set in the city of Coventry - a place I have lived over a decade of my life - it is a low budget movie starring Martin Freeman (star of the 'simple love' story above), but don't let the lack of special effects and venue put you off. You have got to be a pretty cold fish not to be touched by this movie about a primary school teacher who ties himself in knots by making his school believe that Hollywood are coming to see their Nativity play (yes; you heard me right).
You're right, disbelief has to be somewhat suspended; but not as much as you might think. The reading of the letters to Santa is truly heart-breaking (I am not a pretty sight at this point.....even worse than usual!), but if you aren't clapping and cheering during the play within the film then there is something wrong with you.
They've released a sequel this week, but it will have to be pretty blummin' good to hold a candle to the original!

The Family Man
I have never been a big fan of Nicholas Cage, on the other hand for most of this film he is married to Tea Leoni (every cloud.....). A rich, single businessman who 'has everything' is given a glimpse by the fantastic Don Cheadle; a glimpse of what his life would have been like if.......well......that is what he needs to find out. He wakes up married with two children, an outrageous mortgage and a career which is far removed from Wall Street. This couldn't possibly be a life he would prefer could it?.......could it???!!
Predictable - again - it might be, but does that make it less enjoyable? Nope!! A story when someone learns the true meaning of love and happiness is never a waste of time in my opinion; it is to be celebrated. The moment at the airport when he shouts across at the wife he should have had gives me goosebumps (warning - might well be overstepping the 'giving too much away about the story' boundary here)....
"We have a house in Jersey. We have two kids, Annie and Josh. Annie's not much of a violin player, but she tries real hard. She's a little precocious, but that's only because she says what's on her mind. And when she smiles... And Josh, he has your eyes. He doesn't say much, but we know he's smart. He's always got his eyes open, he's always watching us. Sometimes you can look at him and you just know he's learning something new. It's like witnessing a miracle. The house is a mess but it's ours. After 122 more payments, it's going to be ours. And you, you're a non-profit lawyer. That's right, you're completely non-profit, but that doesn't seem to bother you. And we're in love. After 13 years of marriage we're still unbelievably in love. You won't even let me touch you until I've said it. I sing to you. Not all the time, but definitely on special occasions. We've dealt with our share of surprises and made a lot of sacrifices but we've stayed together. You see, you're a better person than I am. And it made me a better person to be around you. I don't know, maybe it was just all a dream. Maybe I went to bed one lonely night in December and I imagined it all. But I swear, nothing has ever felt more real. And if you get on that plane right now, it'll disappear forever. I know we could both go on with our lives and we'd both be fine, but I've seen what we could be like together. And I choose us"

The really big ones are yet to come.......!

Subject Of The Month - HO HO HO!!!!

Nope, not gardening tips.......Christmas!!!!

I actually have Christmas to thank for getting back into the blogging routine. I promised you this time last year that yuletide celebrations would be the subject of the month for 2012 (too bone idle to do it in 2011 I guess), and with time ticking away before we hear the familiar jingle-jangle of sleigh bells outside the bedroom window on the night of the 24th of December (my stalker really does need to stop doing that.....) I need to get my backside in gear.

For me - as for most people young and old - Christmas is a time of celebration; but I also find it a fascinating phenomenon (try saying that after ten pints). It is an occasion the meaning and significance of which often changes as you get older, it is also an occasion capable of such love, kindness and togetherness in one house, whilst next door the four walls are vibrating to the yelling and screaming of blazing arguments as tensions are stretched beyond breaking point. It seems to heighten every emotion; both positive and negative.

I am very glad to relate that in the stories you will hear during this subject of the month, the walls will only be vibrating to the sound of joy, laughter, wrapping ripping paper, Christmas carols and traditional pop songs ('Slade The Herald Angels Sing' and all that) and games; as was usually the case in our house. I am likewisely pleased to report that as much as I fall in and out of love with the whole thing in the run up to the big day, come December the 25th that childhood feeling of fun always creeps its way back into my heart.

So in between running sessions and weigh-ins, I will be taking you on a - very quick! - journey of an Adrian Christmas; some of the stories which meant so much to me, the movies, the traditions, the feelings, the songs. So where do we start? How about when Christmas really starts for me?

Ask Kate Rusby (terrific singer; to be highly recommended) and she would tell you that Christmas officially begins when the Christmas Radio Times comes out, ask many people and they will tell you that the point at which Christmas becomes real is when they are putting up and decorating their tree, some purists may even say that Christmas starts at 12:01am on December 25th (booooooooooriiiiiiinggggg); my Christmas however starts differently (different?......who? me????!).

There is a song, a song which to me is completely and absolutely Christmas. In Dulci Jubilo by Mike Oldfield comes close, Little Town by Cliff Richard even closer, but this song is so full of joy that it's first play of the yule year is anticipated, prepared for, and ultimately relished; it is at that point that Christmas truly begins. I have already planned it for this year; it will be Thursday afternoon in the car as I am wending my way home to the chilly North-West from the slightly less chilly Hertfordshire.

So what is the tune? You are sure you will know it won't you? But you won't. It is not famous, it is damn near impossible to find; but 'Ding Dong Merrily On High' by The Cambridge Buskers is to me, the music of Christmas. Pure joy, pure, positive power. It makes me smile, it makes me dance; and in an instant it reminds me of all that is good about Christmas. If you can find it and download it, play it loud and I promise you, you will not be disappointed. You will also be one of the few people to be in on the secret of such a song, a secret you will be sharing with me and who knows; Christmas for you might also begin on its first hearing!    

Weigh in (73), (74), (75), (76)

Yes, yes, yes......blog posts are like London buses......blah blah yada blah.....

Still playing catch up with everything at the moment; but another blog post means progress; I think!
There are now - count them with me....one, two, buckle my shoe - four weigh-ins to catch up on. I would love to say that my lack of updating is no cause for concern, but as I am concerned that would be a scorching (literally) case of liar liar pants on fire.

By now you should be aware of the new job; the working week of which is travelling down from Manchester to Stevenage at daft o'clock (GMT) on a Monday morning; hotelling it for three nights and then heading back up to northern civilisation (NOT an oxymoron) on Thursday night. It is not sustainable, but something I can do until hopefully both parties (me and company) are in agreement that it is a good match and I can move darn sarf on a permanent basis. Looking good so far!

So; what was a successful routine of gym Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday, with the occasional badminton match is now all over the place.....in actual fact let's be honest here; said routine is shot to pieces. On top of this my food intake is now so much more difficult to control. The hotel I am staying at has a restaurant, and although there are other places to eat they are all under the blanket of fast-food. Just to add a cuttingly acidic insult to life-threatening injury.....the hotel does a fantastic full English breakfast.

I am struggling, and need to find a way to deal with what I am eating; I need to 'make it work'. Fortunately I only have two weeks of this new regime until Christmas, providing me with time enough to devise a plan which manages my diet successfully. It is a plan I desperately need as there are only so many healthy-option Subway sandwiches I can eat of an evening before it drives me crazy; plus during my first week I had a full English every morning.......do I have to say 'not good' or can we just take it as read?

Is that all the trouble?....well.... no it's not. When I do eventually get home I am clueless of what to buy. With essentially only three full days I am either buying too much from the supermarket -  and throwing stuff away - or too little and resorting to takeaways (my first curry last weekend, slipping into old and bad habits......I know I know).

Okay.....that's all the trouble now, I promise.

So enough of the procrastination, what's the score? Well, as Tuesday nights are now away from home, in the interests of consistency I have moved the weigh ins to Thursday nights after the drive home. Here goes......

Weigh in (73) 15 stone 10 pounds
Weigh in (74) 15 stone 4 pounds
Weigh in (75) 15 stone 7 pounds
Weigh in (76) Wimped out after all those full Englishes

So on a positive note I have not done a huge amount of damage; the weight is still in the 15 stonesies. Granted if I had managed to keep the rate of weight loss from post great north, I would probably be at my target weight (whatever that is!) by now, but considering what is going on at the moment it is a case of damage limitation and so far I think I am managing to manage it (good luck or good judgement? I suspect the former......). I confess to being so worried about the most recent weigh in that I chickened out....I swear to you it will not happen again. Good or bad, I will always get on those scales. Feel pretty embarrassed at admitting my cowardice; powerful incentive not to do it again.

I know what you're thinking - I do.....really! - is there any good news? As a matter of fact, there is. I still feel strong, and even though I am writing this post at gone 11pm on a day which started at 4am, I feel good. What's more, I have taken my first step towards a new routine. I say step; tonight there were actually three and a half miles worth of steps. The guys at work - many of which are runners themselves - pointed me in the direction of a running club which makes good use of the psychopath... ....errrrr....cycle paths of Stevenage. It is freezing cold, tiring, hard, and I have to - once more - negotiate the 'go somewhere on your own and try to make a go of it in a group of strangers' phenomenon, but after my second session tonight I am proud to say I am officially a Fairlands Valley Spartan (I am itching to find a way of yelling 'THIS...IS....SPARTAAAAAAAAAA!!!!' at someone). It feels really good to get out on the road, and even better to do it with such a fantastic group of people. There are lots of experienced marathon runners amongst them, and they have kindly offered to make me a training schedule for the 'big one' next April; particularly after they found out about 'the story'. I am starting to believe this might actually happen, even with all the other happenings which happen to be happening at the moment. There is hope; big, strong, mighty hope. So please, keep the faith. Back out there for more of the same tomorrow night!! Oh, and my sister has bought me a flash new pair of running shoes; only for best though......!

I look a right Charlie in my outdoor running gear though........! Why do I sense a self-deprecating photograph coming on....?!

Remember me??

You know, rumour has it that there used to be a kind of interesting blog on here back in the day. They say that if you are very quiet, and listen SO carefully, you can still hear the ghostly tap-tap-tapping of fingers on keys. Whatever happened to him I wonder.....? Does he still think of you, the reader; after leaving us high and dry in mid-challenge? How very dare he do this to you…..

In my previous posts (about four years ago) I made reference to events which were taking me out of my comfort zone, and frustratingly I could not at the time divulge what these events were. I am pleased to say that my vow of silence can now be broken. So what has all the fuss been about? Well, if I said that the previous blog post was written in the front room of my house in Edenfield (Lancashire), and I am writing this one from a hotel room in Stevenage (Hertfordshire) you might be getting the gist.

For the last four years I have worked for a good company; it has been a period with its fair share of challenges, frustrations and yes, successes. Positives though the job possessed; more recently the frustrations and insurmountable challenges were increasing in indirect proportion to any chances of career progression, and the only job satisfaction was self-generated; all in all not the most satisfying way to spend five working days a week. The positives were that it enabled me to live back in my native north-west, and to spend more time with my eighty-something year old Mum only a half hour drive away (it also meant I could see more of Stockport County football matches……but I’m honestly not sure whether that is classed under the positive or negative column!).

Enter stage left, galloping in on its white charger to save me; Propak Architectural Glazing, offering me a job and being flatteringly keen to bring me aboard. Enthusiasm, positivity, challenge, a recognition and appreciation of who I am and what experience I possess, not scared to invest in the right areas to ‘make things happen’, career progression; couldn’t be better could it? The only problem; they are based just shy of 250 miles away from Manchester, quite a daily commute is it not?!

Most people wouldn’t think twice about an opportunity like this, but it may well have been the hardest decision I have ever had to make. How can I explain it? To most people the choice is a classic ‘no-brainer’, but no matter what advice I received from those most people, I knew what accepting an opportunity like this would mean. It would mean unsettlement, it would mean uncertainty, it would mean risk, it would mean upheaval, it would mean ‘starting again’, despite the company bending over backwards so I can stay in the north-west, it would eventually lead to a move to Hertfordshire, it would mean guilt at not being able to spend as much time with my beautiful Mum. Lots of positives and excitement too, but I am realistic about the whole package; and yes, this realism had to include the way this boat-rocking would jeopardise my exercise and healthy eating regime, and the ultimate success in training for and completing the London Marathon next year.

Do I choose the familiar and predictable path; safe in the knowledge that it will look the same in twenty years as it does right now; or do I have the confidence and gumption (gumptidence?) to choose the rocky, fog-filled path whose end is not certain but whose end could be soooooo good?

As you know where I am as I type these words, the element of mystery is gone....solid gooone. I took the job; and this is my first official week at work. It is exciting, and I have been given no reason at all to regret my decision (yet!). The people and ultimate ‘vibe’ about the place is definitely one of desire to make a success of the venture. Nevertheless the decision still does not sit well with me. There are things I have chosen to do for the benefit of others, there are also things I have chosen to do for my own benefit provided they don’t negatively affect anyone I care about; this is the first decision I have made for my own benefit which will also result in clear negativity for others, and that goes completely against my nature. Seeing less of my Mum will come as a blow to her, and me for that matter (at least I have a new job to help take my mind off it); I feel particularly guilty as let’s not sugar-coat it here, at her age the number of days left to enjoy Mum’s company are limited and now I won’t have the chance to spend as many of them with her. Practically too, my absence will create a void of care (shopping, cooking, cleaning, generally spending time with her) which will need to be filled by someone; hopefully.

And yet, despite these misgivings, it still really is a no-brainer, and I feel a better man for making the right decision. I care enough to have regret about what I am leaving behind, but thanks to my own common sense, and a feeling that anyone who cares about me will support what is best for me, I still have the sense to go through it. So bring on the new job, bring on the unsettlement, bring on Stevenage; I’m ready.

The only trouble is, what is going to happen to phase three of Fatmantofitman………? Am I still up for it……..? Stay tuned……

Weigh in (72)

You know those action movies where a guy or gal drives a car down a hill to find out that someone has cut the brakes? Life kinda feels like that at the moment; it's moving so fast and I have no chance of stopping it. All I can do is steer, pray there are no hairpin bends, and wait for the road to level out and the car to slow down. The irony in my particular analogy is that I drove for the hill in the full knowledge that the brakes were banjaxed. I knew this was coming, and terrifying and slightly out of control it may be, I have no desire to stop the car.

This particular post is not the place to explain in detail what the flippin' 'eck I am talking about - it's about the weigh in - but I promise I will. Suffice it to say that the week has been a struggle, as has my control of both diet and exercise levels. The former has been 'ok'; the sort of ok which would be great if I was still visiting the gym three times a week....which brings me on to the latter. I had a badminton match on Friday night and, well; that has been about it. Three weeks with no gym at all. Not good, especially when considering the London Marathon looms on an albeit distant horizon.

Yes I am still shaking off the sniffles - they have not completely gone away - but they are sufficiently absent for it to be a very poor excuse. I'm just out of the rhythm; as a rhythm is what it had become (almost instinctual). Granted, I may have been knocked out of it by circumstances, but one thing is for sure; I need to get back into it again as quickly as possible.

I know what you're thinking....'he's put on weight again'....as surely all this is a precursor to bad news; WRONGGGG! I came in at 15 stone 8.2 pounds, which is a 3 pound loss. Good news yes, but I feel a bit of a fraud as I don't feel I've earned it. I think the previous week's weigh in was inflated due to the night out - and meal - I had on weigh-in night, whereas this week was the traditional pre-dinner routine. I'm shaking it off though, as although I have been fluctuating, it is still not doing massive amounts of damage to the hard work I have done over the last eighteen months (weight-wise at least, not so sure about the first gym visit back). There is still time to lose weight, and still time to train for London.

I fear that the hardest part of the journey is yet to come; made even harder by recent developments, but it's very simple; the harder the task, the greater the achievement. I'm not going to give in, and I AM going to do this.

Whether by random chance or by destiny, the Great North Run DVD I ordered came through last weekend, just when I needed it. I saw the whole spectacle; and the images and feelings came rushing back, as did the feelings of nervousness, participation, pain, and glory. It reminded me that I WAS THERE, and I DID IT; and I will do it London too.

It is going to be tough though........

Thank You For The Music - Running Elite (part two)

....and now the concluding instalment of 'groovy jogging tunes to get me going, get me running, get me rocking, and hopefully get me 26 miles and 365 yards'........

Let Love Be Your Energy (Robbie Williams) - 'if you've got no love for me then I'll say goodbye'  (don't know why but I give a mock salute on the word 'goodbye', lots of funny looks in the gym...!)

Let The River Run (Carly Simon) - 'Let all the dreamers wake the nation'

The Living Daylights (A-ha) - 'Set your hopes up way too high, Living's in the way we die'

Love's Great Adventure (Ultravox) - 'Wha-a-a-oh!'

Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now (Starship) - 'If this world runs out of lovers, We'll still have each other'

Ooh ahh....just a little bit (Gina G) - Well I told you this blog would be honest! Guilty pleasure this one, with the emphasis on guilty. For some reason I do a little dance routine to this aswell!

Pink Sunshine (Fuzzbox) - Great beat, plus I also just love the phrase 'Pink Sunshine, by Fuzzbox'!

Positivity (Stevie Wonder) - 'Some people live in what was and what they could have been, As opposed to living in a what is and how much they can, And be the first to complain about nothing in life going their way, The attitude is "that I can't do nothing 'bout, And very happy with just breathing in and out, The ones that when you say "lets go make a difference", They'll say "naw that's OK"

Proud (Heather Small) - 'What have you done today, to make you feel proud?'

Reach (S Club 7) - DUM DUM DUMMM, DUM DUM DUMMMBA DUMBA DUM DUM DUM!

Rev It Up (Bewitched) - It's just so blummin' cheerful!!

The Rhythm Of Life (Sammy Davis Jnr) - 'sigadigadigadurgan'

Right Here, Right Now (Fat Boy Slim) - The way the beat builds up, feels so intense

Rollercoaster (Bewitched) - 'I can't believe I'm doing thiiiiiis, I can't believe I'm DOING THIIIIIIIIIIIIIS, AAAAAAAAAAAGGGH!!!!'

Searching My Soul (Vonda Shepard) - 'I've been searchin' my soul tonight, I know there's so much more to life, Now I know I can shine a light, To find my way back home'

Second Hand News (Fleetwood Mac) - 'Bam-Bam-Bam-Bam-B-B-Bam, Bam-Bam-Bam-Bam-B-B-Bam, Bam-Bam-Bam-Bam, Bam-Bam, Bam-Bam, Do-Doodle-eee-Do' (that's what I sing anyway)

Shine (Shannon Noll) - 'Get up, get up, get up, get up, Lift your head, C'mon, c'mon, Get up out of bed, Today's the day you hold the world, With your song'

So What's The Fuss (Stevie Wonder) - Turn up the bass for the intro!!

Some Of My Lies Are True (Huey Lewis and The News) - 'Sooner or later when you say I love you, You're gonna realise that some of my lies are true'

Sound of the Underground (Girls Aloud) - 'The beat of the drum goes round and round'

Stop The Rock (Apollo 440) - fantastic beat!

Take Me Out (Franz Ferdinand) - serious guitar riffs!

Things Can Only Get Better (D:Ream) - 'You ain't never gonna know me, But I know you'

This Will Be An Everlasting Love (Natalie Cole) - 'Huggin'and squeezin'and kissin'andpleasin' togetherforever throughrainorwhatever' not to mention 'SolongasI'mlivin'trueloveI'll begivin' toyou I'llbeservin'causeyou'resodeservin'

Tubthumping (Chumbawumba) - 'I get knocked down, but I get up again, You're never gonna keep me down'

Two Tribes (Frankie Goes To Hollywood) - Another intro in perfect rhythm with my running!

UP! (Shania Twain) - 'When everything is goin' wrong, Don't worry, it won't last for long, Yeah, it's all gonna come around. Don't go let it get you down, You gotta keep on holding on'

Warriors (Ronan Hardiman) - Instrumental......raw....dark...power.....

The Voice (Ultravox) - 'Native these words seem to me, All speech directed to me, I've heard them once before, I know that feeling'

Wave Your Flag (David Bisban & Knaan) - 'Give me freedom, Give me fire, Give me reason, Take me higher'

When The Going Gets Tough (Billy Ocean) - 'I got something to tell you, I got something to say, I'm gonna put this dream in motion, Never let nothing stand in my way' (no double-negative sarcasm please)

When Tomorrow Comes (Euruthmics) - 'When you need someone to depend upon when tomorrow comes'

Well, that's it! There will no doubt be a few toe-tappish, foot-stompish additions over the next six months - I'm currently on about 4 hours and twenty minutes of music so another ten songs should get me to the finish (any nominations?) - but these for me are top of the list when it comes to eliciting positivity, power, strength, energy and courage; I don't know about you but I think this is a successful recipe for completing a marathon.

Give them a try sometime. Who knows?!...you might even start liking Gina G..... Okay that might be hoping for a bit too much - and you might want to steer clear of Bewitched - but the rest are pretty good; promise!!

Weigh in (71)

There is a teeny tiny chance that the wheels may be falling off at the moment. No way to sugarcoat it, now weighing in at 15 stone 11.2 pounds, which represents another three pounds on. Half a stone in a fortnight takes some doing doesn't it?! Even I was surprised this time. As usual, before getting on the scales I did the usual flashback of what I did (credit) and what I ate (debit), and although it was far from ideal I would not have arithmeticked a week-end debit of this magnitude.

So what has got the wheels so wibbly-wobbly? You know that unsettled feeling I talked about last week? Well, it still hasn't gone away; although a decision (see previous) has been made, action inevitably has to follow; some of which are going to be highly unpleasant, and others merely come under the category of 'significant upheaval'. All of the above is hardly commensurate with de-unsettling (isn't there a better word for that?!!) my current state of mind. Focus is proving very hard to gain, and even harder to maintain.

The gym trips have dried up once again too; haven't been at all this week. I just can't snift the shiffles at the moment, and am nervous about going back before I am fully fit. Some people say that exercise can shift a cold, but surely it depends on how bad the cold is; it could just as easily make it worse and I don't want two weeks away from the gym to become a month. The diet has been okay, but without working up a sweat three times a week what was a dietary misdemeanour has now become a capital offence (shooting the sheriff being downgraded to a slap on the wrist).

No fast food this week, nevertheless there was a fair bit of indulging at the weekend at our family bonfire night. Got a bit of exercise with all the preparations, but that was more than counteracted by the sandwiches, burgers and mulled wine which were finding their way - quite by accident you understand - into my gob. Then on the night of a much later weigh in than usual it was a trip out to see the new bond movie (excellent film; particularly on the giant IMAX screen, even I fancy Daniel Craig when his pecs are that size!), ended up at Papa G's again for a regular BBQ Chicken burger and fat chips, with a side order of.....fat chips (incidentally fat chips are not as bad as they sound; the 'fat' refers to their size. They are more like wedges, so more chip and less fat....I'm not convincing you am I?!!). As my usual pre-weigh-in routine is a trip to the gym and getting on the scales before I have dinner - opposed to going out, having a big dinner, and getting on the scales in the early hours of Wednesday morning - there is mitigation in this week's result which hopefully will revel, or even reveal itself when I get back into the usual routine.

I'm trying not to panic Mister Mainwaring (that should be a challenging pop culture reference for any non-UK residents), at either the alarming weight gain or the fact that two weeks out of the gym will put me several steps back in training for London next year (okay; typing that has got me a little bit panicky........panic growing...........we are now at def. con. 2; see I can even do U.S. cultural references!).

I know, noone ever said this was going to be easy; and like so many things that are worth doing there are challenges along the way. Strangely enough I need them, we need them; they test and strengthen our resolve to succeed, and not be defeated by the obstacles put in our way, by fear, by doubt (see post on 'The Adjustment Bureau', see; there are common themes running through my life!). So what am I going to do......?

1. Not panic
2. Eat careful
3. First badminton match for three weeks on Friday night (should be interesting!)
4. First gym trip for two weeks on Sunday morning (taking it gently)

The prospect of taking positive action is already a comfort, and makes me confident of getting the weight going in the right direction this time next week (regretfully not as quickly as it went upwards I fear.....little steps.....little steps....). I also believe that the cycle of 'feeling poorly = no exercise=putting on weight=feeling crap=feeling poorlier......' vicious circle can just as easily become 'light exercise=feeling better=losing weight=feeling better still=more exercise=more positivity=feeling betterer stiller' with a few tweaks and a bit of effort. Life's schedule appears to be getting back to some semblance of normality now so I feel I'm ready to get back to the gym and have a go without doing myself much of a mischief; the rest should follow.

Fingers crossed for better news next week.

Weigh in (70)

It is with a heavy heart, as well as regretfully with a much heavier body that I bring myself to write this post; but them's the rules of blogclub - besides of course 'YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT BLOGCLUB' - that I have to be honest and give the rough with the smooth. Care to have a punt on which of these you're getting today boys and girls?!! It is a whopping FOUR pounds on, weighing me in at 15 stone 7.8 pounds (oh go on, let me round down just this once??.......worth a try; 15 stone 8 it is then).

Pause for gasp.......

I guess the positive thing (possibly the only positive thing!) is that once again it is not a surprise. I've been full of a cold all week and just can't seem to get it shifted. There have been no trips to the gym. I did try one evening, hoping to put into action the 'sweat it out of your system' principle; unfortunately I succeeded in the slightly less celebrated adage of 'sweating it even further in to your system'.

In addition to the sniffles I don't think I am over-dramatising things when I say that this has been the most unsettled week since way before Fatmantofitman was so much as a glint in its fathers eye. There was the regular stress which comes from being in a sales-related profession (targets to achieve, walls to beat your head against etc), but to compound things I have been presented with one of the biggest and toughest life-choices I have ever had. To protect the innocent (and some guilty too) I can't go into too much detail, but suffice it to say I stand at a major crossroads in the life of Adrian Blaydon (good job I haven't taken a wrong turn and ended up at someone else's junction....look right, look left, look right again.....yep....it's definitely mine). In one direction I have a road of comfort and familiarity which is very likely to lead to frustration and boredom in the not to distant distance; in the other I have a largely unknown road of upheaval and fear (not forgetting of course, hope), which may very likely lead to achievement, happiness, success and all round good stuff. Sounds like a no-brainer, but to consciously forsake comfort and choose the more difficult path that lies ahead - and risk it ultimately not turning into achievement, happiness, success and good stuff - is both an exciting and terrifying prospect.

At the risk of repeating repeating myself myself, it comes down to an all too regular occurring question....'Do I dare?' Am I prepared to make my life intentionally less comfortable in the short term for the successes it could bring, or do I not bother out of fear of failure, settling for the lot in life I currently have? I think I know my answer, but I am almost too scared to give it. Procrastination man.....that's me.

Although 'unsettled' in this case is not an entirely bad thing it - along with the cold - has taken away all my focus, and I have slipped into the old naughty ways again. Naughty way; they are always lurking; looking for their opportunity to take hold again. Maybe not completely fast-food dominant, but a Chinese takeaway earlier in the week and a trip to Macdonalds on Monday night (large Big Mac Meal, large McChicken sandwich meal......yes.....all eaten by me) are hardly contributory factors to a healthy balanced diet are they? Not good is not an exaggeration. Previously I have eaten badly while still going to the gym and got away with it, and on occasion I have missed the gym while still eating well and dodged a bullet; now we know (as if we didn't already) what happens when exercise and diet go to pot.

So what now? Is the challenge in jeopardy?

NO!! I REFUSE TO LET IT GET THE BEST OF ME

There will be a degree of damage limitation required over the next week; and possibly the week after. I can't see myself making it to the gym for at least another week. It's a worry but the damage I could do by getting back on track too early doesn't bear thinking about. I need to eat well; being a bit poorly and losing my ability to exercise does not give me an excuse to give up on my diet aswell (that was kind of how I felt this week). I of course need to make a decision with regards to the above crossroads, but most of all I need to find some peace. My brain is awash with all thoughts of sorts (??!) and I need to find a way to quiet it. I'm not totally sure what I am going to do to achieve that, but I suspect it will involve a very hot bath (topped up regularly by careful big-toe dexterity) and a Kindle which contains that bird with the dragon tattoo.

Don't worry, I am far from beaten........

Thank You For The Music - Hypothetical Conversations

What follows is what I oh so wish to be a true conversation between Toto band members - and songwriters - David Paich and Joseph Williams, during the course of creating the hit song 'Africa'. To save having to repeat the names, assume that lines alternate between them......

'Right then; that's the chorus sorted out' (DP)

'Oh go on Dave, pleeeeeeeeease?' (JW)

'Not a chance Jo, there is no way on earth I'm letting you do it; you'll sing it the way it's written'

'You're no fun Dave. Honestly, no one will ever know; and it will be such a laugh'

'No. For the last time Jo; I am not allowing you to sing 'I've left my brains down in Africa', no matter how much you beg me'

'I tell you what Dave. I'll only do it once during the song; and will change when I do it each time so no one will suspect. I'll even fudge, so it sounds a bit like 'I bless the rains down in Africa'; no one will be quite sure exactly what they are hearing. It'll be our secret. Oh go on Dave; live a little!'

(David pauses to rub his chin thoughtfully.......................)

'Alright Jo; I'll do you a deal......I will allow you to slip that line in once during recording - don't tell me when, I don't want to know - if and only if you accept and succeed in my challenge'

'Deal!!!'

'Don't be too sure; you don't know what it is yet....'

'Oh don't be daft David, there's nothing you can challenge me with that I can't manage without so much as a click of the fingers'

'We'll see about that. Okay then. Well we've done the chorus, and I'm going off to the pub and leave you to sort out the verses'

'That's the challenge?!!!'

'Oooooooh no. The challenge is that you have to seamlessly incorporate a line of my choosing somewhere within the lyrics. You have to make it sound like part of the song - to my satisfaction - and not a line that you have just stuck into the song to win a challenge that allows you to to sing 'I've left my brains down in Africa' during the chorus. Then and only then will I agree that you have won the challenge and allow you 'I've left my brains down in Africa' during the chorus'

'Not a problem; what's the line'

'Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti'

(Long, unblinking stare from Jo to Dave..................)

'You're kidding, right?'

'Nope!'

'Oh do me a favour Dave. How the stuffing hell am I going to get that line into a verse; you're 'avin a larf' (suddenly Jo turns into a cockney, apples and pears, chim chim chereeeee, corrrr bloimey Meeery Poppins...)

'Well, you want to leave your brains in Africa; so you get a rising Kilimanjaro. Of course if you don't accept the challenge.....'

'I didn't say that. Leave it with me, I accept and what's more I will beat your challenge. Have no doubts about that my friend.'

(Three long months go by - okay, months are a clearly defined time span; thank you Professor Hawking - Jo locked in his office; only emerging - crazy eyed and unshaven - to take on meagre rations of food and water. Finally.....the door is flung open and a scrawled-on piece of tear, blood and heaven knows whatstained A4 paper is thrust into Davids hand....a slightly hysterical giggle escaping Jo's lips)

'I don't believe it Jo; you've actually done it. This could become one of the most memorable song lyrics in history; leaving your brains splattered all over Africa seems a small price to pay for such genius (although looking at you, I think you'd better go looking for your marbles aswell as your brain, as they have also clearly departed for another continent). We keep this whole thing between ourselves right?'

(an exhausted Jo, glazed eyes, twitching cheeks, rocking back and forth (him, not the cheeks), gurgling quietly to himself amidst the odd burst of unhinged giggling, gives a barely discernible nod. We leave this scene as Jo reaches a trembling hand for the phone and dials the number for The P.C.D.S......Priory Centre for Deranged Songwriters).

I slightly kinda sort of suspect the potential existence of the fact that there may be limited reality to this story; but at the very least they must have felt pretty chuffed with themselves on coming up with that line. The most perfect combination of rhythm, song and syllables I have ever heard!

Weigh in (69)

Now be honest guys; own up. It's a really nice thing to do, but could whoever keeps sneaking into my house during the week and nobbling my scales please stop doing it?! I have no idea how you are managing it; have you installed a microchip which connects directly to your computer so you can override the read-out? If so am I going to see '24 stone 12 pounds' after you've had a particularly bad week at work and have an uncontrollable desire to Schadenfreude my arse off?! If you stop now I won't come after you....if you don't.....well.....I will not be held responsible.....that's all I'm saying.....

Just kidding......(or am I?)......

More head-scratching, and another weigh-in the millisecond before which I was thinking 'prepare yourself; this time you have definitely put on weight', I almost sound disappointed to reveal that it's another pound off! Actual loss is 15st 5.4lb to 15st 4.2lb. To all of you who want the cut, thrust and drama of a periodic weight gain I am so sorry to disappoint; this is getting a bit monotonous isn't it?!! I make no apologies, this is the sort of monotony I would happily perpetuate.

With the exception of one night, I guess I was by and large a good boy; but on that one night I was very, very, very bad.

The company I work for were taken out by one of our suppliers for a 'bit of a do' as thank you (thank us) for the work we had put their way. There was a ghost walk, there was curry, there was peshwari nan (mmmmmm, peshwari naaaaaaan....gurgle gurgle) and by heavens was there alcohol. I went into the evening thinking 'right, a couple of lagers, a nice poppadom, curry, nightcap, bed before midnight', but it ended up being 'a couple of bitters, walk to another pub, another bitter, walk to another pub, another bitter, walk to indian restaurant, lager, glass of champagne, poppadom, curry, naaaaaan, nightclub, beer, boogying along to 80's classics, beer, cocktails which tasted like Ribena and Tango, walk back to the hotel, glass of wine, in bed gone 4am'. It has been a long time since my stop-out has ever been that dirty!

I really don't know what got into me. The whole concept of 'going clubbing' was lost on me when it became legal to do so (sneaking into Coco Savannah's - Stockports finest club, don't ask - underage was so exciting....and so easy!), but as it turned out I was very much up for it last Friday. I think it was partly the fact that the club we were in seemed to have inside information on the music which has a habit of making me get jiggy with it around my kitchen (B'witched, Tiffany, Spandau Ballet, Duran Duran, Manic Street Preachers.......okay I lied about that last one, just felt the urge to put something a bit cooler into the list.....hello, my name is Adrian Blaydon, and I am a lover of cheesey 80's music........"Hiiiiii Adriaaaan"), but without a doubt the biggest reason was finding a dance partner who can reeeeeeeally dance. Regretfully I cannot go into details - protecting the innocent and all that, as for me...totally guilty - but suffice it to say we clicked on the dance floor; and I fear I will never dance like that again (shoulda known better than to cheat a friend.....guilty feet have got no rhythm........sorry, couldn't resist). For certain I will never listen to 'I've Had The Time Of My Life' again without a smile on my face!

So after a night like that I am amazed at this weeks result. Maybe one nights slip doesn't ruin a week? Or the exercise I was getting on the dance floor balanced things out a bit? As usual I'm not going to overthink it, just hope that it continues as at this rate I should be breaking 15 stone before the end of November and then I can start pounding the streets......running I mean......no images of a nutter let loose with a pneumatic drill.....

In short, it's all going swimmingly.........

(Could I publicly apologise to my spell-checker; all the repeated letters and 80's band names have really put it into spasm. Soooooo sorry!!)

Thank You For The Music - Running Elite (part one)

Considering the first and only post on this so-called monthly item was well over a month ago the title is a bit daft really, but what the hell! Anyway, back in the mists of time we (I'm not taking responsibility for this on my own you know, guilt by association my friends) opened a subject which represents one of my biggest passions. Music for me is not just the food of love, it is the food of life. I had you - hopefully - playing certain inspirational tracks during the course of the Great North Run to see if the positive vibes would travel through the air and reach my staggering corpse as it trudged through Newcastle. Well, whether you did or you didn't, I made it; so it certainly didn't do any harm!

I also alluded (and believe me, I don't allude very often; and even then only in the privacy of my own home and the curtains drawn) to an elite running playlist; that collection of powerful, motivational and more often than not cheesey tunes which seem to galvanise me into standing proud, picking up my stride, and momentarily forgetting about the mind-altering agony going on below my waist (don't be crude) and indeed above my waist! There may be a few additions and eliminations over the next six months, but by and large this is part one of an alphebtieiissed list of songs which will see me over the London finish line, along with an idea of what makes them so special.....

Born to Run (Bruce Springsteen) - 'just wrap your legs round these velvet rims and strap your hands 'cross my engines' (bit naughty but brilliant line!)

Boys of Summer (Don Henley) - truly a rhythm divine!

Break Up The Concrete (The Pretenders) - 'Shake it, bake it, earthquake it'

Breathe (Prodigy) - 'Breeeeathe with me'

Burning Heart (Survivor) - 'Though his body says stop, his spirit cries - never!'

Crazy Little Thing Called Love (Queen) - perfect running rhythm!

The Crunch (The Rah Band) - no words, just proper 70's instrumental, with the emphasis on mental!

Dancing in the Moonlight - 'It's such a fine and natural sight'

Deeper Underground (Jamiroquai) - funky!

Die Another Day (Madonna) - 'I'm gonna close my body now'

Dr. Fell (Juliet Turner) - Love her northern Irish accent!

Duel of the Fates (JohnWilliams) - Serious choiring!

Easy Lover (Phil Collins/Phil Bailey) - 'Before you know it you'll be on your knees'

Eye of the Tiger (Survivor) - 'Went the distance now I'm not gonna stop.....a man with his will to     survive'

Faith of the Heart (Russell Watson) - 'It's been a long road, Getting from there to here, It's been a long time, But my time is finally here'

Faron Young (Prefab Sprout) - 'As obsolete as warships in the baltic'

Free Falling (Tom Petty) - watch Jerry Maguire; that's how it feels to listen to it!

Get Outta Your Lazy Bed (Matt Bianco) - 'GET UUUUUUUUUUUUP!!!!'

Gimme Dat Ding (Pipkins) - just an all-out craaazeeeeee song!

Go Away (Gloria Estefan) - 'Live your live, But live it real far away!'

Gold (Spandau Ballet) - 'You're indestructable, Always believin' you are gold'

The Golden Age (The Asteroids Galaxy Tour) - 'Gonna make these songs for the chicks to dig'

Good Thing (Fine Young Cannibals) - perfect running beat

Greatest Day (Take That) - 'Today this could be, the greatest day of our lives'

Hip to be Square (Huey Lewis and the News) - 'I'm workin' out most every day, and watchin' what I eat'

Hit Me With Your Best Shot (Pat Benetar) - 'Knock me down, it's all in vain; I get right back up on my feet again'

Hit That Perfect Beat (Bronski Beat) - serious energy (used to play this during popmobility classes I used to go to years ago....I still remember the routine!!)

I Hope You Dance (Lee Ann Womack) - 'I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance, Never settle for the path of least resistance'

I Wish I Was A Punk Rocker (Sandi Thom) - 'when kids were wearing hand me downs, And playing games meant kick arounds, And footballers still had long hair and dirt across their face'

In My Arms (Teddy Thompson) - good memory of a great live concert, and just a brilliant song...especially when played loud!!

It's My Life (Bon Jovi) - 'My heart is like an open highway, Like Frankie said 'I did it my way'

Karla With A K (The Hooters) - another one to play loud, gentle intro then.......kapow!

Keep On Running (Spencer Davis Group) - pretty obvious really!

Part two very soon.

That's not a song title, what I mean is part two of the running elite list is coming soon.

That's not a song title either...........and nor is this.........

Who's on first base.......!!!!!

Weigh in (68)

Okay, now this is really starting to really get on my nerves. I wouldn't exactly say I am making an effort to gain weight, but yes, I am letting a few more things slip to see how far I can push it before the current downward trend is reversed. If you recall, I have been progressively getting away with more and more of the naughty while still losing a steady one pound a week.

So let's see what's on the board Miss Ford; very healthy eating........with the small exceptions of one and possibly two Chinese takeaways (can't remember...not good!) this week, and a cheeky supersize Burger King Meal on the way to my friends 40th birthday party at the weekend (kind of forgot to tell you about that didn't I Ali?......oops), and the continued invasion of the margarine blobs (they are everywhere...no escape I tell you...run.....flee for your lives!!). So.....not very healthy eating at all then.

The plusses were two regular visits to the gym, as well as an hour's jog just past 8 o'clock on a cold frosty Sunday morning (good morrow masters aaaaaaall!); the latter I am particularly proud of as - being in  the foreign lond known as Landon (?!) - finding a nice place to run took a bit of preparation; not to mention the getting off my arse in the early hours, donning the gear and getting out there taking more than a bit of motivation. Nevertheless I downed my homemade blueberry muffin feeling chuffed at already having achieved something with my day...not bad for half nine in the morning eh?

Now you should be thinking what I'm thinking; that there is now way on earth I am going to be able to maintain the trend of losing a pound per week with this performance; and you would be quite correct in that conclusion, as I have actually lost two. Confused? Join the club my friend. In actual fact it is 1.4 pounds from 15 stone 6.8 pounds to 15 stone 5.4, but still; it was a massive shock to see another weight loss; even got on the scales a further three times to make absolutely sure!

I'm not sure how many bullets I am going to keep dodging, but it is inevitable that sooner or later my luck will run out. For now - as I would with a weight gain - I will just accept it and crack on. Don't worry, I have no intention of escalating my diet to three Chinese takeaways, two Burger Kings and a pizza in a pear tree; a diet like the one I have been having recently is not great regardless of what weight I am or am not losing. I am off to a works do (ghost walk around York....oooOOOOOooooh!) on Friday and regrettably we are off to an Indian restaurant afterwards. I have heard that curries are one of the most unhealthy things you can eat; probably why I have lost nigh on four stone through not having one since the start of this blog. Still, I will partake and hope the consequences are not too severe. Other than that I am back on the straight an narrow with the grub....honest.

The next week will see me putting together the training plan to lead me up to London. The Marathon book my bruv bought me is truly dizzying about the types of exercise advised to get you ready for 26 miles. There's long runs, short runs, interval training and hill runs; there is even something called Fartlek training. I don't want to sound all childish by saying the latter makes me giggle because it has the word 'Fart' in it........but it really does make me giggle because it has the word 'Fart' in it. It's the little things...... Anyway; hopefully we will have a schedule to work off within the next fortnight, which at the current rate should be nicely timed for breaking the 15 stone mark and the start of the roadrunning!

There are sure to be bumps in the road ahead, but for now I am loving this plan coming together!!!

Weigh in (67)

I really thought I had pushed it too far this week. Over the last fortnight I have been eating okay but not totally naughty-free, and yet still managed to lose a total of two pounds; it is inevitable therefore that my diet is going to get even less naughty-free to see how far I can go before my luck runs out. It is with some surprise therefore that I give you the good news of another pound off (here comes the science.....15 stone 7.8 to 15 stone 6.8, rounding up to a current weight of 15 stone 7 pounds, got it?!).

There were no takeaways, but I distinctly remember the re-introduction of margarine blobs to my diet (they have been away for a long time.....great name for a Doctor Who Episode....Attack Of The Blobs!!); particularly in a rather delicious meal which consisted primarily of mashed potato with so much marg in there it could well have been the main ingredient. I exaggerate.......although thinking about it, possibly I don't!......but you get the gist. I was also over at Mums last weekend and we had our customary not-the-healthiest-thing-in-the-world Marks and Sparks tea and custard tart for afters. All in all, not a very bad boy; but hardly good!

What I can't quite work out is that I am still taking it a bit easier at the gym. Granted I am still knocking off the best part of 30km for the week, but it is a lot less than I was running in the build up to the Great North, and yet it seems to be easier to lose the weight.

I say again that there appear to be physical changes occurring. I'm trying not to overthink it - it's working, just leave it alone and let it happen Blaydon; oroit?!! - but my hunger levels have increased (stronger and more often) so it makes me think that the body has finally given up trying to fight what I am doing; deciding to help more and hinder less. As always, it doesn't really matter why; what matters is the little digital read out which is telling me good news.

The 15 stone mark is going to be an interesting milestone for a couple of reasons. First of all, the last time I was a fourteenstonesomethinger was at secondary school (over two decades ago); it is hard to believe I can turn the metaphorical clock back that far. The second reason is that it will commence the road-running (meep-meep....you think I could get hold of a Wile E Coyote running vest? better still I need to find a running friend, then they can run about 100m ahead of me and wear a Roadrunner vest! I really do need to stop thinking sometimes don't I.....? now you have no idea what I was saying at the start of these brackets do you?...read it again and ignore the brackets this time) phase of training for London. I just about got away with doing all my running on the treadmill for Manchester and Newcastle, but my body has to get used to pounding pavements if I am going to manage doing that for the best part of 5 hours.

Over the next half stone loss ('ark at me, talking about losing half a stone now like it's shelling peas!) I'll be putting together a program of running to take me all the way to April; incorporating road running on a Sunday morning. Until then I'll just keep knocking the kilometres out in the gymmmy gym gym.

Before I go; a quick shout out to June (I do not believe that she is actually busting out all over, although the Red Cross are standing by) who has become a new acquaintance (dare I say friend?!) and occasional running mate at the gym. It turns out she did the Great Manchester Run this year too, and is now back in training; working up to the Blackpool half marathon; running for Leukaemia Research. A lovely lady (Christ, that makes it sound like she is in her 70's....if she is then she looks flippin' good for it). We exchanged our 'why the bejesus are we doing this' stories and she ended up asking me for advice......ME?!!..... ...OFFERING ADVICE ON RUNNING?!!.......WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM, AN EXPERT?!!!!! Nevertheless, I gave her the benefit of my experience and tried to sound like I knew what I was talking about (speak with conviction and noone will ever suspect your talking bol.....derdash). She also said she had told her friend and hubby about a guy she'd met at the gym - a fellow runner - who was a real inspiration; I genuinely did not twig that she was talking about me!

Her race is on April 7th; a fortnight before mine. I sense a bit of joint celebrating come end of April!!

The One Thing......

So, here we are my friends.....two races down, almost four stones down, and at that point where it could all fall apart. I was about to say 'all be for nothing'; that wouldn't be true - what I have done is of course really something - but getting a place on the London Marathon now looms ever larger on the horizon as the one thing which can prevent me from achieving the ultimate goal. Of course there are injuries, which can be unpredictable; but if I am sensible the only thing that can stop me from crossing the start - and hopefully finish - line darn sarf is not being allowed to!

As you know, being turned down by the British Heart Foundation took the wind well and truly out of my sails; add to that the statistics that only one in seven applicants get a place on the general ballot meant pessimism ruled the roost. I knew I had to get my arse in gear and start applying to other charities, but such was my negativity it was a real struggle. You remember what I have said previously about daring to try? Well, in this instance I was extremely reluctant to do just that. It is laughable when the the fear of failing in my attempt of gaining a race place (which would of course be brilliant, making it an ace race place!) stops me attempting, thus guaranteeing failure. Despite the obvious illogic, that is exactly how I felt.

With the ballot draw imminent (first half of October) I knew that time was running out for me to get applying; so I dragged my fingers to the keyboard, first to Leukaemia Research, then to Kidney Research. The one thing I was determined not to do was be crass and apply to every single charity I could find who were offering places. I wanted to select them because they meant something to me (and in any case the application process always asks you 'why do you want to run for our charity?' I don't think 'because I want to run the London Marathon' is the correct response, do you?!). Leukaemia Research was selected as in 1985 my brother was diagnosed with the illness, and thanks to the incredible dedication of staff and groundbreaking research made in treatment he has been clear now for over two decades and is now the proud natural father of two fantastic children. Kidney Research was in tribute to a lovely lady called Lesley Valentine who whilst playing alongside me for our Badminton league team was also unbeknownst to me undergoing dialysis. She has since had her long awaited kidney transplant and is now looking and playing better than ever! What a woman!!

After that the links between charities and myself were getting more and more tenuous; that was until Monday night (last week) when I had a conversation with my sister about our Mum. She is a quite amazing and still beautiful woman in her early 80's with rarely a bad word to say about anyone. Definitely a Mum to both love and be proud of. Since Dad died over eight years ago she has been rattling around on her own in a house which used to comfortably accommodate a family of eight. With all of us (my siblings and me) well and truly flown the coop and working during the week, it only really leaves weekends available to spend time with her; this lack of company during the week has been a constant worry for me. Being stuck at home for five days without a solid person to talk to can't be good for anyone.

Anyway, back to the telephone conversation. Brother Dom (not a monk! my brother, called Dom) has been banging on for quite a while about contacting AGE UK to see what they can do to help. Doing so proved to be a masterstroke. In that one phone call with my sister I had my eyes well and truly opened about what this organisation can do. They are experts on Mums situation, and given that situation they are experts on what help she needs. They came on board with suggestions of practical help such as an extra handrail up the stairs, or help getting about the house; but most importantly in my opinion they can offer help with Mum's emotional well being; offering confidence-building sessions, opportunities to go out and mix with people of similar age, or even just someone who can come round a couple of times a week and spend some time with her (if the latter is all that ends up happening, it's still brilliant). Let's be honest here, I am not well studied in geriatrics. I flatter myself that my instinct leads me to do the right thing more often than not, but it is an immense source of comfort to know that we have now got a source of professional advice and assistance to make Mums remaining years - may they be many! - with us as happy as possible.

It took a while for it to sink in..........AGE UK.........charity.........helping my Mum........me.......looking
for a charity to run for......but it got there eventually. I filled out my application at about 7:45am, and by 4:50pm I had a phone call......

"Is that Mr. Blaydon? Hi, it's Helen Parsons calling from AGE UK"

"Blimey, you don't waste any time; I only applied this morning!"

"Well we don't like to hang around. Have you got a few minutes to answer a couple of questions about your application?"

"Of course, fire away"

(ensued chit chat about what you already know; race history, my story, Mums story, how I intend to raise money)

"That's brilliant!! Well I'm the coordinator for our runners in the London Marathon so please feel free to call me if you have any questions at all; we want to give our runners every bit of support. We send out packs with advice on fundraising and training, plus we have an experienced marathon runner available if you require any 1-to-1 assistance. On the day itself we have lots of cheerpoints with spotters looking out for runners wearing our running tops so you'll have no shortage of supporters on the big day itsel............."

"Helen, I'm really sorry to interrupt you, but before you go any deeper into the sell of what you can do; could I just say that you are making it sound like I already have a place with you?"

"Yeah, you noticed that did you?!!!"

"Does that mean what I think it means?!!!!"

"In truth Adrian, you have a great story, great determination and a great reason to run for AGE UK; we would be delighted to have you run with us."

"Oh my God....you have made my, week, month and you stand a pretty good chance of making my year aswell! I accept!"

So there we are, I'm on, I'm in! As I sit here, I can hardly believe that I might actually do this. The obstacles blocking me from my ultimate goal are slowly being removed (bulldozed, destroyed; call it what you will); so much so that I can now actually see it. I know there is a lot that can happen in the next six months before April 20th (date for the diaries) but when I think about not only crossing that line, but doing it for such a worthy and personally-relevant cause it brings more of a smile to my face and tear to my eye than ever before. I wonder sometimes whether there is something bigger at work; it almost seems too perfect to run for the British Heart Foundation in memory of my Dad for the first two runs, and the last - and biggest - is for Mum. I ask you.....HOW GOOD IS THAT?!!!

(by the way, I needn't have got my knickers in a twist about getting a place; although I didn't get in through the ballot system both Kidney Research and Leukaemia Research offered me places too!)

So now it only remains to say one thing.....

Let's do this.

Weigh in (64), (65), (66)

What is the collective pronoun (pride of lions, murder of crows etc) for a group of weigh-ins? Let me see.....I know......henceforth it shall be known as a 'creak'; there we have it, a creak of weigh ins.
I assure you that I have still been keeping up the Tuesday night routine, but just haven't got around to writing about them. No excuses; it wasn't like I was busy doing anything else.....ahem. This will hopefully be the one and only creak you get, but in actual fact having three results immediately following a run has been interesting.......

Tuesday 18th September
Two days after the run, and either I was a particularly naughty boy (well, I always am, but in this case with regards only to what I am eating), or the physical effects of a half marathon tend to have echoes far beyond the finish line. Weighed in at a whopping 16 stone 1 pound; representing a gain of five pounds?!!! I honestly did not know what to make of it; granted I did tuck into a particularly creamy spaghetti carbonararahurrah on pre-race Saturday, and my post-race diet was something along the lines of Mr. Creosote (there's a pop culture reference for you, who gets it and who has to look it up?!!)  but nothing I could think of could explain a weight gain of that magnitude.
To be honest I was still in the midst of 'I DID IT!!' Euphoria not so much as two hoots were given. Confidence was high that whatever damage done could be undone; plus with over half a year between Great North and a potential (if application successful) London Marathon I had plenty of time to lose the gained weight and do enough training regardless of a week or two of nutritional hedonism.

Tuesday 25th September
This did not bode well. Following on from the previous week's result my diet was quite frankly disgusting (tell it like it is Blaydon......thank you, I will!). As I recall, Tuesday night consisted of home-delivered pizza......oh no, not one; there was a two for one deal on 12 inchers......and I may have thrown in a large cheesey chips for good measure (would it help if I said that the pizzas were thin crust??.....nope?......I would say it was worth a try, but it wasn't even that was it?!! how about if I said that I didn't eat all the pizzas??......mind you, I did finish them off the following morning for breakfast.....). There was definitely a Chinese takeaway in there, and my not so usual these days trip down the road for fish, large chips, meat and potato pie, large peas and regular curry sauce (not to mention about half a loaf of bread.......oh......I just did mention it!). So it's fair to say that when it came to food, I was very much in the debit column. Things did not fare any better for exercise; the week directly following the run I was on holiday from both work, and from the gym; so my days by and large consisted of getting up, having breakfast, sitting down on the sofa, having lunch, having dinner (see above), getting up, going to bed. I absolutely LOVED it, but it did no good for my chances of losing weight. The only positives I could take as I popped on the scales were a badminton match on the Friday, and a first trip back to the gym a few hours before weigh in. I was prepared for the worst.
So could somebody please tell me how I ended up weighing in at 15 stone 9 pounds?!!!! This officially takes me from the biggest weight gain the previous week to the biggest weight loss....six pounds?!!!
You know I mentioned weird physical effects of running a half marathon? It's got to be that hasn't it? My poor body did not have a clue whether it was coming or going, or walking or running. I am guessing that this represents a 'back to normal' weight. Nevertheless it still remains a six pound loss, so yay!

Tuesday 2nd October
Bringing us right up to speed this week, and back on track....sort of. No social badminton on the Friday (fell asleep at 7pm and that was that until gone 9), but fully restored to the usual routine of three trips to the gym; nothing too strenuous, but a nice 12km on Sunday...sweatilicious! So no problem with the exercise levels. Was a fairly good boy with what I was eating; I confess my sin and am prepared for my penance (eating raw carrots?) for eating another Chinese takeaway, but other than that I couldn't find any major straying from 'the path'. With all the to-ing and fro-ing of the past I was just looking for either breaking even; or I even settling for a SMALL gain (not five pounds, that would be classed as a BLOODY HUGE gain). Big surprise and big smiles therefore that I am now an official 15 stone 7.8! Chalk another one pound off the totalizer. Although this challenge was started in the high 18 stones, my heaviest has been 19 stone 7; 0.8 more pounds and that amounts to 4 stone. Happening as gradually as it has, it is hard to believe that I am no longer lugging round that sort of poundage.
For the sake of the blog however it will not be an officially official four stone until I get down to (let me check Weigh in (1) and Weigh in (3), and add the number that I first thought of.....) 14 stone 11 pounds. Getting closer!

Since last Tuesday, I have been noticing changes. My usual routine of bagel in the morning followed by cup-a-soup for lunch and a regular meal in the evening is just not cutting it at the moment. I am rumbly-in-my-tumbly starving way before the next meal. Previously I have managed fine, but I am starting to wonder whether I would benefit from slightly more adventurous breakfasts to get me through the day. I have no desire to eat badly, but maybe I just need to eat a bit more. I'm no nutritionist but I am thinking it might have something to do with metabolism....that's usually the word people use when they can't explain what their body is doing isn't it?!!

I'm not going to dwell on it much; whatever I am doing has got me feeling good, and still losing weight. If it ain't broke.......!

Great North Run 2012..........(part 3)

12miles - finish!
The large flashing '1 mile to go' sign was a welcome sight, but one not to be reached before negotiating the steepest - and by virtue most painful - part of the course. 400m of serious incline which after twelve thirteenths of the race very nearly knackered my knees (kneeckered?); and the surprise?....it was downhill.
Suddenly subjecting the joints to movements which were essentially the complete opposite of the previous twelve miles were a bit much. The body was suddenly under strain to stop myself from going too fast instead of not fast enough. It was unpleasant to say the least; but as I said, the slide ended at the glorious notice telling me the last thirteenth of the race had begun.
Fortunately I had been warned about the final stretch, that it literally did seem to stretch (some of the more evil of my acquaintances told me that if you are doing to die of a connery it is usually at that point....that was good of them wasn't it?!!) for miles. I kept my head down and tried hard not to think about the finish, just one step at a time. Lots of 'come-on!'s as the half mile mark hoved into view, a yell from the sidelines where my brother was waiting to cheer me home, and an all-encompassing thought released from deep within, a thought which had kept me going in the gym for those hard months of training; that I was actually going to do it.
The ecstatic crowds were deepening, a sure sign that the finish was not far away. Finally there it was; a simple fibre-glass and steel structure with digital clock at the top; nothing much to look at, but passing under it would mean the two-thirds fulfilment of a now not so impossible dream. Emotions took over; however as soon as I realised how difficult it is to cry when you are completely out of breath. I pulled myself together!
Fists clenched, grimace-smile on my lips.....I crossed the line.

The Aftermath
The next twenty minutes or so were a bit of a blur; punctuated by bouts of pain! I have seen marathons where people are teetering about with rubber legs that look like they are about to buckle, and often do. I now totally understand how that feels. You are told to keep moving, both so that your body can adjust to the fact that you are no longer running, and to avoid clogging up the finish area with collapsing sweaty bodies. It is strange that after running for just over two and a half hours, the simpler act of walking is such a challenge; the legs don't feel like they belong to you, and the adrenaline wears off to leave you with.....well.....pain basically.
We queued up for our goody-bags (tee-shirt, power bars, medal, leaflet entitling you to one bacon sandwich free when you buy five......kidding). As the rain started to pour down, and I started to feel the chill I made for that plastic, tin-foil lookalike blanket (don't think that is the actual name for it!) which you see so many runners wearing. Very effective at keeping you warm, and not only that you can pop me straight in the oven four eight hours at gas mark 5.
The charity village was stacked with tents for every worthy cause you could imagine. I made straight for the British Heart Foundation. On reflection it did make me laugh as the rough statistics within the tent were that there were forty chairs, twenty sat on by runners looking somewhat the worse for wear, and twenty sat on by their supporters.....while more than twenty runners were staggering round the tent looking for a sit down!! I never did enjoy musical chairs at our school parties!
Finally I found a place to take a load off, and not before time as my legs were giving me not unsubtle hints that it was time for a sit. It was then that the nausea started; about ten minutes of really bad seasickness. It did pass, and it was only then - sipping on a cup of tea and chomping on a ham sandwich which one of the volunteers had shoved into my hand - that I could reflect on what I had just achieved; but to be honest I still couldn't process it. Still a bit dazed by the whole thing.
Dom (bruv) came along and it was then that I realised how important it is to have support with you; or at least with me! Someone who can bolster you when you are nervous about the run, and more importantly share in the joy of completing it. It was his honour - in Olympic stylie - to don me with my medal, not forgetting the official clasping handshake (no national anthem). It now stands pride of place at home next to the Great South and Great Manchester......how good does that sound?!!!!

After the Aftermath
Getting home was extremely tricky. The choices were either to get back to the car by the Newcastle Metro (tram) system (a mile queue) or by the ferry from South Shields (half a mile queue). It was after about ten minutes waiting in the latter that I realised an hour of standing up and shuffling forward every fifteen minutes was not for me. I wasn't particularly bothered about getting home quickly, just getting home safe and sound. So a convenient bench came to my rescue and there I sat, watching the queue grind forward to a stage where it was making real progress, and I felt able to make it to all the way to the front.
As luck would have it, I ended up just behind Elaine and David; what a terrific couple. They were there supporting their son, and we inevitably shared much of our respective stories. We must still have queued for quite a while as in addition to the Great North, we covered our respective home towns, our footballing proclivities, the Ryder Cup, holidays, and Davids love of real ale!
What touched me more than anything was that as we neared the front of the queue, we were in that cut off zone which meant the difference between getting on the ferry, and a twenty minute wait for the next one. Elaine and David were in front of me, and I was the last one through before the metaphorical barriers went down. David turned to me and said 'that was lucky; if you hadn't have got through we would have had to swap places.' Something so simple; he didn't have to do it, the right thing to do? absolutely; but people doing the right thing is all too often a rare commodity. We parted as old friends, and Elly and Davie baby (like I said, old friends) said they might even dip into this blog; I replied that they may even get a mention!
I am reminded of a line from Michael Palin's 'Round The World In 80 Days' on leaving a dhow and its crew that made him feel like part of the family.....'as I wave goodbye to them it is almost impossible to believe that I will never see them again'. Elaine and David, if you do read this; I hope that our paths cross again.
The rest of the trip went without incident, and I was home, watching the BBC race coverage and tucking in to my Big Mac meal, McChicken Sandwich meal and McFlurry (not one smidge of guilt) by about half past nine. Watching it on the screen it was again difficult to accept that I was in there, that somewhere within that forest of bobbing heads, was my bobbing head. When you are running, all you see is your little area, the people around you, the few yards ahead; the enormity of it all passed me by. In the days that followed, in addition to the general stiffness, was a slow realisation of what I had accomplished; tying in my own personal images with those seen on the screen. It felt good, and may I tell you it still does. I dip into the memory every so often when I need inspiration, encouragement, positivity; I am not one to live in the past, but if I ever visit, I will never get tired of reliving that day.
The Great North Run 2012, one of my finest hours to date........