Come on, be honest; you were thinking I'd forgotten you weren't you? How could you think that you - who have journeyed with me on this two year odyssey - would not be allowed to be there at the finish?! You know the result, but here is the full and true account of the build-up to and aftermath of what proved to be the most extraordinary of days; not to mention the bit in between. I suspect that this will span over more than one post; hey, if it's good enough for Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows......parts 1 and 2, it's good enough for fatmantofitman!
I think anyone who knows me (and if you have read me, you know me) also knows that I am usually good at predicting my emotions. It is not in an effort to kerb them; it just ensures that when the powerful ones do hit I am as prepared for them as I can be. However, as I stood there waiting for that peculiar forward-shuffle of people in front (an indication that people are being trampled underfoot by keen runners wanting to get nearer the start line, but more than likely just a sign that the starting gun had kicked us off) I confess that I what I thought I would feel, I didn't actually feel. It was still a good, just different....
Expected......
10% determined
10% focused
80% excited
I thought I would be jumping about like a mad thing, thrilled to be there, thrilled to be almost at the end of the journey, drinking it all in.
Instead.......
50% focused
50% sheer, utter, unfettered RELIEF!!
Think about it for a minute, all that could have gone wrong over the last two years; then think of the panicky feeling that sets in when the big day approaches and you know that should something go wrong there won't be enough time to put it right. The panic just grows. You play it all through in your head to make sure you have planned everything (sponsorship, registration, gear, kit, blogposts, accommodation for the whole weekend, charging all the gadgets, logistics, to name but a few; oh, and don't forget to get some rest!!), and yet you still have that sense of 'left the gas on', you've forgotten something but you just can't remember what you've forgotten (cos if you can then it wouldn't be.....). Is it any wonder that when I was finally stood 'there', and the only thought in my mind was 'run'; a humongous weight was lifted off my shoulders.
It doesn't always work out for some people; one athlete with a 'gold ticket' (not Willy Wonka, it's the official notification of a place on the marathon) got her times wrong for registration; turned up a half hour after it shut and that was that. What a horrible thought.
You may ask when it was that I was the most nervous? Not only can I recall it, I can also tell you that it was exactly eighteen seconds duration. It was the time it took between me stating to the hotel concierge that I had a room booked with them that night (Saturday), and said concierge tapping away on her computer to eventually ask me whether I would like a morning call. No amount of checking and double-checking the booking could rid me of the panic-induced thought of no reservation = no available rooms = where the hell do I sleep?!! = as all my plans for Sunday morning being based on leaving from that hotel, HOW DO I GET TO THE START OF THE RACE FROM WHEREVER I WAKE UP???!!!
Nevertheless, booked in I was; and as the door closed behind me in the sanctity of my hotel room I knew I was almost there. Although Murphy's 'if anything can go wrong it will' law may still hold true, with every minute, every potential trip-up negotiated; there was less and less that could go wrong.
I wish I could say that I managed to relax for the rest of the evening, but in truth there was much to do. Filling out the form which divests the marathon organisers from any responsibility if the worst happens (cheery old job that!), attaching the official race number to the official AGE UK shirt, attaching your timing chip, a bit of blogging, chatting with friends and family coming along to support and finding out where they will be en route (some of them said that would be cheering for me at the 20+ mile post.....that's optimism for you!), sorting out what I will be leaving in the car when I pop on the train, sorting out what I will be leaving in my official marathon bag when I pop (??!) on the marathon (leaving just me, a drink, and a couple of bananas....which is actually the film sequel to 'The Cook, The Thief, His Wife and Her Lover'! ), and finally sorting out what to wear (to two-layer, or not to two-layer, that was the question, and not to be turned out to be the correct answer!).
Eventually though, outfit laid out, blog blogged, dinner (club sandwich, chips, choccy cake) scoffed, breakfast ordered, bags packed, gadgets charged, confident, focused, but very excited; tucked up in bed, and on the night before one of the potentially greatest achievements of my entire life by far all I had to do was get a good night's sleep..........
Yeah right.....that's gonna happen.......
